"Hey, Dudes!" the tanned, blond man with a lot of teeth said from behind the Headmaster's desk. He seemed right in place in the tiki hut motif, with his loud Hawaiian shirt, frayed cutoffs and flip-flops. The only thing that kept him from looking totally the stereotypical Caucasian surfer were his binocular glasses and metal briefcase. "I hear you guys take English! Tubular!" he said in that language.
"Uh, my grades aren't that good," Ranma said in Japanese.
"Miss Hinako doesn't really treat it as a foreign language, but as a way to introduce us to foreign literature," Akane elaborated, also in Japanese.
"Bummer!"
"Well, he seems to understand us," Akane said.
"But can he talk to us?" Ranma wondered.
"(Ha, ha) Sure I can, hoapilis! There are more Asians in Hawaii than there are any other ethnic, and most of those are Japanese-American, and and that's not counting those like Mr. Kuno, The Japanese-stop!" His accent was terrible, but intelligible. "They're most of my clients! Oh (Ho, ho), I forgot to introduce myself. I'm Mr. Kocho Kuno's lawyer. ' Name's Vlad Schnickle!"
Ranma took his offered hand. "You'll excuse us if we don't try to pronounce your name?"
"(Ha, ha) Of course not. All your paisanos call be Bubu."
"We were told that Principal Kuno wrote us into his will," Akane said. "How did he die? I just saw him yesterday. Doesn't it take a while longer before a will can be legally read? And what about probate?"
"Man, Akane. Do you have to be so practical?" Ranma said. He was just glad that the lawyer's presence confirmed that he wouldn't be bothered by the headcase any more.
"The dudette's correct! But the all the legal details aren't important, if the party of the first part isn't really dead."
"What???" both martial artists cried.
"Let me read from the will." He picked up the piece of official looking sheaf of papers, "Finally being of sound mind and body, I intend to stay that way. Therefore, I bequeath my problems on whichever minor member of the Anything-Goes School of Martial Arts who..."
It turned out that, Kuno's problems were
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らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
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