“So Naruto, what are you in for today?” questioned Sarutobi.
Iruka pinched the brow of his nose, and looked distinctly uncomfortable, “Actually Hokage, the matter at hand has to deal with Saotome… An unfortunate line of questioning has lead to the current issue.”
“And what did the young Saotome do to warrant this office visit?” I can send the ANBU to fetch him again if it’s serious,” the Hokage responded.
“Ah, the matter doesn’t pertain to Ranma, but rather his mother…” Iruka’s voice trailed off, as he shuddered in fear of the woman. “Naruto, show the Hokage your skill.”
A gleam of delight appeared in Naruto’s eye, as he began the hand signals for what appeared to Sarutobi to be a plain transformation jutsu. With a cry of “Sexy no Jutsu!” nubile flesh appeared, and a buxom naked blonde squealed with delight.
“I knew you would come around to the awesome power of my jutsu, Sensei,” the blonde responded. “The technique is so amazing…” Naruto’s exposition was cut short by a rap to the head.
A dumbfounded and gaping Sarutobi stared vacantly as blood trickled down his nostrils.
A flustered Iruka sighed, “I think you can see where I’m going with this Hokage. Naruto, we discussed that your transformation jutsu was to be clothed.”
“I understand Iruka sensei. Ranma’s mom said sometimes the best bits should be artfully covered ‘to entice the imagination and ensure that interest is maintained’,” Naruto replied with an air of understanding.
“Naruto… That’s not the answer at all!” Iruka screamed. “Hokage, you have to stop her.”
Sarutobi inhaled deeply, letting the smoke seep into his lungs before he answered, “So Naruto, I’m assuming that Nodoka provided the reference materials for your ‘Sexy no jutsu’. “
“Yeah, Ranma’s mom is the best. She said that it was a promising sign that I was interested in ‘manly’ things at my age,” Naruto replied.
The Hokage sighed, “No promises Iruka, but I’ll disc… actually I’ll have Ibiki discuss the matter with Nodoka.”
“Really, the kid’s a freaking Genius, with the capital G,” raved a medic-nin to his blond comrade. “To actually take the principles utilized in the Icha Icha story Medic-nin Momoko and reverse engineer them to functionality is mind boggling.”
“And the diagnosis is conducted the same way as in the book? The patient is naked and the medic runs his hands along the patient’s body to ‘feel’ the chakra lines?” queried a leering blond.
“Saotome did it one better, he used his own chakra to illuminate the pathways before striking the tenketsu. The Kurama clan had no choice but to accept the Saotome’s boy diagnosis. I verified the tenketsu’s effect on the chakra system as well,” stated the broadly smiling medic-nin.
“What?! He sold the parents on the location of the tenketsu?! But there are other tenketsu with similar effects that don’t involve touching the areas around… oh, you sly dog. You didn’t inform the parents of the other tenketsu locations,” reasoned the blond.
“Well the parents never asked about the tenketsu other than to verify the effects, and I was unsure whether the tenketsu Saotome used were necessary for fine Chakra manipulation,” replied a grinning medic-nin.
“A well reasoned response, and such verification would require the presence of the Hyuga,” replied the blond.
“Of course, a little plausible deniability is necessary if the Kurama Clan choose to use an outside source to verify the findings,” replied the medic-nin. “Honestly, the Icha Icha Ninja will be Konoha’s next jounin and will revolutionize perversion.”
“Hokage, we would like to request to be present during academy student Saotome’s technique display,” solemnly intoned the dog faced ANBU member. “The ANBU members currently present feel that it would be wise to insure that back up is present to secure the practice area. After granting student Saotome’s techniques such a lofty ranking we feel enemy ninja’s may try to interfere.”
A haggard Sarutobi sighed into his palm, “You realize that this information isn’t even a half a day old? Enemy nin would have to be…”
“Hokage, if I may be abrupt. Scrying techniques similar to your viewing orb exist. But you are overlooking the most important factor, Nodoka’s pride in her son’s achievements.” The dog faced ANBU nodded sagely.
“Hrrkk…” the pained sound issued forth from Sarutobi’s mouth like a death rattle. “Despite my reservations about your motives, your reasoning is sound. You are to insure that the practice range is to be clear of any outside observers. Request help from the Hyuga if necessary.”
Ranma shivered before entering his home. Something catastrophically bad had just occurred, and Ranma had no doubt that he would be facing the repercussions.
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(Posted Wed, 14 Jan 2009 08:35)
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