Rabbid Ranma: Bright Future: Time for a Really Obvious Pun in the Title [Episode 218681]

by Lord Dragon Claw

Setsuna was simply relaxing after checking on the Time Gates. With the amount of chaos in the time stream now, a great many things about Crystal Tokyo had become different - and for the better! She was really glad she caused that demigod to screw up and accidentally deliver the Great Will to Ranma rather than “Rama Soddom”. With the amount of chaos that caused, the eventuality that the human race would become extinct was now such a rare possibility, and so easily prevented, that she need not worry.

Had she allowed Rama to receive the Great Will like he was supposed to, Crystal Tokyo would have come about as originally planned and envisioned. They’d be able to resist and survive the next three wars with other races with minimal casualties... but the fourth war would wipe them out - simply because their opponents, energy beings known as the Drej, worked by attrition. That, and they blew up Earth while the Senshi were busy fighting the Drej armada.

Sailor Pluto had witnessed the fall of mankind through the Time Gates just before Luna met Tsukino Usagi for the first time. She also checked to see if she could do anything with the Senshi to improve their chances and hopefully prevent their extinction. No such luck. So she checked other avenues... The problem was, the way the future would progress was too orderly and not quite flexible enough. So, she looked to see what chaotic influences could help her save the human race. She found the Granddaddy of All Chaos Magnets in a boy named Saotome Ranma. On top of that, he was naturally at a disposition to want to help people. That was very good.

So, she made one little change in the boy’s life and nearly the entire course of the future had been rewritten! Sure, what she could see of what the most likely futures would result from this change constantly fluctuated - and even switched positions - but the human race was much more numerous in the future - and allied with one of the various Makai realms, lead by a powerful Overlord named Laharl. Also, a new breed of humans invariably resulted from that one small change - the Rabbids. The Rabbids, unlike the original Rabbid who had come through an interdimensional vortex and fallen into one of the Jusenkyou springs as a result of Ranma using the Great Will, were mostly sane and rational. They were Ranma’s descendants, and they all had pink hair and rabbit ears. They were a little crazy, but practiced a chaotic form of martial arts and chaos magic, which Setsuna saw would be extremely effective against the Drej due to the fact that it messed with their basic energy patterns.

Also, due to the friendship that Laharl and Ranma would likely form after their first fight, the Hibiki Directional Curse placed on Ryouga’s family by Laharl’s grandfather would be dispelled. Ryouga’s descendants would make powerful fighters and demon summoners as well as excellent bodyguards.

As she shifted to a more comfortable position on the sofa, she thought about what she had watched, in real-time, Usagi’s first battle as Sailor Moon. Setsuna realized at that point that Luna was a bit of an idiot when it came to combat. She’d probably have to get Ranma or Ryouga or somebody to train the Senshi to be better fighters - at least Jupiter was already off to a good start as a fighter!

Setsuna also saw that the human race, with the help of their demonic allies, would start an empire. Not a flawless utopia that stagnated in its inability to progress past a certain point like she realized the original plan would cause. If the Drej hadn’t been able to wipe out humanity, the next war would accomplish the job. But the Empire of Sol would branch out, eventually recolonizing the planets that had originally been populated during the Silver Millennium and branching out to Alpha Centauri while helping Laharl conquer other Makais.

Setsuna was broken out of her musings by her cell phone ringing. As she checked the screen to see who had called her, she smiled at the unexpected benefit she had gained from giving the Great Will to Ranma: Gaara. Sure, the memories gained from the universe being reconstructed due to Ranma’s influence allowed her to remember coming to this age as a sixteen-year-old high school student and meeting Sakabu Gaara. She also learned the tragic story that was his life. Gaara’s family had been a clan who could combine their ki and magic into a new energy form they called chakra, which they used to perform strange, but powerful, feats.

When Shukaku got angry and started to throw a temper-tantrum near the rural ancestral home of the Sabaku Clan, Gaara’s father, Shinimaru, trapped the demon within a teakettle. Pissed, Shukaku began to influence the dreams of Gaara’s father. Soon, the man had a form of dementia, and had illusions of grandeur. As his wife, Karura, went into labor, the man transferred Shukaku’s soul into Gaara’s infant form. Gaara’s mother died as she gave birth to the redhead.

Some time passed as the Clan Head of Sabaku tried to train Gaara to become the ultimate weapon, but when the boy refused to kill his Uncle Yashamaru as part of his psychological conditioning, Shinimaru became very angry and tried to kill his own son, only to be killed by Gaara’s Sand Shield. After the death of his father, Gaara became despondent and depressed. Akasuna Chiyo, a family friend, took over the running of the household while Yashamaru took Gaara, his older brother Kankuro, and their older sister Temari, to live in the city. They first moved to the Shinjuku district, where Temari completed her education as an English Major. Kankuro went through high school but did not go to college, but opened up a machine shop instead. That was when Yashamaru was offered a better job in the Minato district, specifically in the Juuban ward, so he and Gaara moved there.

Setsuna met him as she had been transferred recently to the same school. At first, they remained distant from each other, but Setsuna could see that he was different from the other, more normal students (and a double check at the Time Gates confirmed it). Gaara could sense her magic. The knowledge that the other was different from the rest of the population caused them to start talking, eventually becoming close friends. Eventually, they were boyfriend and girlfriend.

Setsuna answered the phone after the split-second she took to reminisce (time magic was awesome!).

“Moshi moshi, Gaara-kun!”

Gaara greeted her, but remained somewhat proper. He said he was with his friend, Dr. Ono Tofu, in Nerima at the moment (which would explain why he wasn’t talking to her intimately).

“I see. Might I ask why I owe you the pleasure of speaking to you?”

She could imagine Gaara raising his eyebrow. He then asked her why she didn’t expect him to call already.

“With the amount of chaos rolling around the time stream at the moment, my predictions for day-to-day activities are a great deal harder to predict.”

Gaara grunted in understanding. Then he explained what he and Tofu wanted to do, and Gaara wanted Setsuna to come along for moral support.

“Of course! Just let me get into some casual wear and I’ll be over in a few minutes.”

Gaara said he loved her.

“I love you too!”

The redhead said goodbye.

“Bye bye!”

:::

Voodoo Spike had finally arrived in the Itabashi district at the location that he had calculated Ranma would’ve landed - an empty lot.

Either he landed here and left already, thought VS. or I forgot to calculate how wind currents would affect a person on the receiving end of Akane’s mallet. Again.

Looking around, VS saw a restaurant. Figuring he could ask a few of the patrons, or the waiters/waitresses, if they had seen someone as unique as Ranma, he walked up to the door.

“Hello! Welcome to Ucchan’s! I’ll be your male waitress today. May I take your order?”

VS raised an eyebrow at that. But then he saw a pair of pink ears poking out above the crowd of patrons, with empty plates stacked high.

“No, but I need to speak with your rabbit-eared patron. If you don’t mind, I’ll just see myself to his table.”

“What business do you have with him?”

“The people who run the home he’s staying at are worried about him not coming home hours ago.”

“Oh. Go ahead then, but see me on your way out.”

As VS walked though the large restaurant, avoiding patrons, chairs, tables, waiters, and waitresses alike, he was annoyed that Ranma had simply been EATING.

“Saotome-san, I presume.”

Ranma blinked while in mid-bite. He looked up to see a familiar face, but it was missing the twin candles that had adorned his head. It was Gosunkugi!

“I am Gosunkugi Hikaru. Your fiancée, one Tendo Nabiki, requested my help in tracking you down. I agreed, as she would be one of the few people I would call a friend. And yet, here I find you. Eating without a care in the world. No worries. No thought to call your fiancée.”

Ranma swallowed, nearly choking on the bite of okonomiyaki he had in his mouth. Gosunkugi was scary!

“If I ever have to do this again, and I find you to be completely safe and unrestrained, I am going to make your life a living hell. Now, pay your tab, if you can, and let’s return you to Tendo-san.”

“Tab’s already paid for,” responded Konatsu, startling VS.

“You have ninja training?” asked VS, as he turned to the male waitress.

“Yes.”

“Your stealth is better than mine,” lied VS. While it was true that Konatsu’s stealth was really good, Hikaru’s detection abilities hadn’t sensed the male kunoichi move - possibly because he was much faster than VS could track. Then he turned back to the pink-haired boy. “We are returning now.”

“Before you leave,” began the crossdresser. “I’ve got a questionnaire that Madam Kuonji wants you to fill out, Saotome-san.”

“Uh, okay.”

Ranma read over it and filled out the questions to the best of his ability.

“What does it mean by ‘seeing someone’?”

“Dating,” replied VS. “It has nothing to do with eyesight.”

“Oh. Well, I am then.”

“Thank you,” said Konatsu as he took the completed paper from Ranma. “Come again!” Before Ranma could respond, the male waitress was gone.

“We have wasted enough time. We are going.” With that, Voodoo Spike left, forcing Ranma to hurry to keep up.

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(Posted Wed, 18 Mar 2009 06:50)


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