"Ah," said Jiraiya, staring for a moment but then shaking his head. "Oh. Okay. What do you need?"
"I do not remember how to dress," said Tifa.
"Oh," said Jiraiya, getting up. "Okay. Other than the parts that look rigid, it's hard to tell that you're not human."
"According to Kizna, I could pass as a cyborg human," said Tifa, leading Jiraiya to the stack of clothes. "Most of my human-styled parts replicate the human form completely."
"Okay," said Jiraiya, not leering because he was still getting used to the idea. He shrugged after a few moments. He didn't really need to use the 'harmless pervert' role here anyway. "You start with panties. That's those there."
"Interesting," said Tifa, holding the garment up and stretching it. "Do you know the purpose of such?"
"Depends on who you ask," said Jiraiya drily. "Just start with that, then the bra."
Tifa looked at the second garment as soon as she'd put on the first and then looked very uncertainly at Jiraiya.
"Okay," said Jiraiya, shaking his head. "I just KNOW someone is going to walk in and get entirely the wrong idea."
"Why?" asked Tifa.
"Because you look like an attractive young woman and I'm fastening your bra into place," said Jiraiya as he did exactly that. All the while expecting that someway, somehow, Tsunade was going to walk in the door and a beating would commence after about three seconds of awkward silence.
"Ah," said Tifa. "I'm sure that would make sense if my memories were intact."
Jiraiya stepped away from Tifa as soon as the little clasps were in place. Then he stared at his hands. "Odd. Your skin is warm and feels real. When we were handling you earlier, not so much."
"Because I am operative now, I would guess," said Tifa. "Systems at 89% currently."
"Yeah," said Jiraiya, cursing himself for not getting a better feel in. Though it was still kind of creepy with the body language being so off. "Next do the top, then the skirt. Boots and gloves after that."
"I see," said Tifa.
The door flew open, Jiraiya screamed and backed towards the corner, covering his head.
"Uhm, is this a bad time?" asked Kizna.
"Anyway," said Kizna much later. "This is where we part company. I'd suggest getting a change of clothes before much longer."
"What's wrong with my current apparel?" asked Tifa.
"White top, suspenders, leather skirt, heavy boots?" asked Kizna. "For one thing, it's not very functional. Though, honestly? I wasn't talking about you."
"What's wrong with MY clothes?" asked Naruto.
"Too distinctive," said Kizna. "You've mentioned you're trying to avoid some people. Changing your clothes every so often is just going to help in that regard. Try to blend in a bit more."
"Good point," acknowledged Jiraiya. "Good luck with your work, and I hope we meet again."
"EH?!" asked Naruto. "What are you wearing?!"
"This? Fully articulated armor," said Jiraiya, for once without his usual gear. It was all plates of dark red over a white under-armor, and it looked... scruffy somehow.
"It appears to have seen use," said Tifa.
"Yes, the usable parts taken from three sets of armor and put together," said Jiraiya. "The salesdroid thought I was doing it to be cheap. That isn't the reason though. Can you guess why?"
"Because you're cheap?" asked Naruto.
Tifa blinked.
"No," said Jiraiya. "Because the armor looks old and used, like I may have had it for awhile?"
"So?" asked Naruto.
"You see what I have to put up with?" Jiraiya asked Tifa.
"Yes," said Tifa simply.
"Now we shop for Naruto," said Jiraiya, smirking.
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(Posted Sun, 04 Mar 2012 18:49)
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