“I choose the Disgaea option, so I can get Plenair-Sama’s autograph!” Kyuubi squealed in glee bouncing around like a little kid hopped up on sugar.
*KA-ZAP!*
Well at least until she accidentally hit the wall of the ‘petting zoo’ pen. Then she bounced around like a little kid who had just received 10,000 volts of electricity directly to her body…
Toltiir considered the smoking Bijuu for a moment before snapping his fingers, forming a small bucket of water over the prone Kitsunes head. A bucket that promptly upturned and dumped its contents over the Kyuubi’s prone form.
“WHO? WHAT? WHERE? 1372!”
“Good now that your back with us Kyuubi-chan… perhaps you’d like to see the options I have picked out…. And do remember local ordinances require all bars inside Jinchuriki’s to be no smoking!”
Kyuubi growled for a moment before sighing and settling back on her haunches to watch as Toltiir expanded the Disgaea options to show 6 floating screens. 5 with images showing, the 6th just pure black.
“Ahem is the class ready?”
Kyuubi blinked.. when had Toltiir switched into the black graduation gown outfit and how was he holding a pointer. For that matter where did he find a Bijuu sized dress and Seifuku for her own magnificent form?
“Good now class pay attention, as you can see the Disgaea universe provides us with ample choices for fusion and manipulation.”
“Take this option here, probably one our young pupil will enjoy…. “ Kyuubi blinked as the first screen enlarged showing herself… except where did the mechanical parts come in among her glorious form… and who was that inside her left eyeball???
“As you can see in this timeline, you apparently wandered off to explore the netherworld and some prinnies were commissioned to create a bio-mechanical replacement with chakra generators to simulate your power while in the EC… which Hanako promptly took for a joyride on her day off cooking for Laharl and ended up rampaging towards Konoha and getting the Shinigami to seal said Mecha up inside of Naruto.
Now class take note that the seal was specified for the Kyuubi, or Mecha-kyuubi in this case, and not Hanako. Thus she can escape, of course being in the confines of the seal she has to find first a exit from the facsimile of yourself and then from the seal as well… In the meantime having nothing to do but watch Young Naruto live his life and form a crush on the young boy after noting similarities to her big brother.”
Kyuubi nodded. “All of course to give you entertainment once she manages to escape, rather than just go home to the netherworld right Sensei?”
“Of course! Once she escapes or is freed by Etna… as it is only a matter of time before Etna gets bored enough o track down her apprentice… or Laharl gets hungry enough… the real fun begins. Especially if we set up Hinata to be Ayeka to her Ryoko… Kukukuuu… but that’s for future consideration. On to the second timeline.”
The first screen shrunk away as the next in line enlarged for viewing, showing a young female with black hair and pointed ears staring in disbelief at a piece of paper. “Behold Yukimaru, last female Ninja of the Snow clan. Here with her brother Fubuki investigating the remains of her village after defeating overlord ‘Zenon’… a little twitch of my nose and she discovers a active magical betrothal between herself and a the Uzumaki clan. Who also only have one male left if considerably younger than herself.”
“Oh what’s the age difference?”
“Well Yukimaru is 20, as for Naruto.. well it depends on when the portal girl in Holt village sends her, and perhaps others to Konoha… could be just at academy graduation, or maybe the wave arc (I wonder how she’d match up against Haku in ice combat?),or the time skip… and…. Oh wait that’s right you have no idea about future events like that do you class… stupid 3d life forms and linear time progression….”
Kyuubi took a moment to try and figure that out, before discarding it noting that sensei Toltiir had moved on to the third screen.
“Now in this one, the Shinigami takes a bit more active hand in the Jinchuriki it made. Now it can’t guide Naruto because its busy being... Well the god of death of course. Still it does have a debt due to it by Laharl for interference with the Red Moon. A debt that in this timeline will be called in.”
The screen flickered to a throne room where a young blue haired kid began yelling in shock at the summons that appeared before him… up until the point that two female demons popped up, and one began to tease him… at which point a truly evil smile crossed his face.
“Of course even a young overlord knows that occasionally you have to delegate. Hence he assigns his minions Flonne and Etna to be the guiding force for Young Naruto. He is also a rather petty one and wants revenge for being stuck in a bottle for a couple of years, so arranges that at least initially Etna and Flonne will appear near Naruto as only doll sized to be ‘proper angel and devils on the shoulder.’.”
Kyuubi shuddered as she imagined herself being miniaturized to that size and having to tell people how to be good. Still not as bad as being Eiken-fied tho… OH look there is the fourth reality now.
“However we don’t have to include the demons directly either… lets fast forward to the Wave Arc, where team 7 hears of a haunted house no Ninja has ever been able to enter, even balking the Sanin and some good boy named Tobi. This is of course because said house was set up with Demon wards which is different from chakra… and keyed to a certain bloodline. One of course Naruto possesses as he accidentally stumbles in and explores the house, discovering the hiding place of his grandmother Jennifer… on the run from the EDF after they got the drop on Gordon. Yes Naruto heir to the 37th defender of the earth… and possibly a few netherworld retainers… certainly Kurtis might show up to train the boy for a bit…. Possibly his grandparents to if Laharl is feeling generous (after all Gordon is his minion so he would be obligated to rescue him… or his Prinny… eventually…).”
Kyuubi waited for the fifth screen to enlarge. When nothing happened after a few moments she cleared her throat. “And what of the fifth timeline sensei?”
Toltiir had the grace to look embarrassed. “Well you see the author was running out of ideas and doesn’t own a PS3 so is only familiar with 1 and 2… so this timeline just has the prism rangers kidnapping young Naruto to be Prism Ranger orange and having him with them when they head towards Evil Academy for some reason… you see in this timeline…”
Kyuubi blinked as Toltiir went into a detailed description about this timeline, but was distracted by the authors cheap distraction Toltiirs damaging of the fourth wall making her wonder what ‘Squshi Squishi Puni Puni’ was and why she wanted to play it with Naruto. She blinked as Toltiirs pointer smacked on her desk.
“If you are done daydreaming Kyuubi… you will be happy to know I have chosen which one to use for fun. We will be going with….”
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(Posted Sat, 01 May 2010 22:40)
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