...A demon of some sort that looks nearly identical to the Kyubi No Yoko crashing through the wall with a roar. Needless to say, this surprised everyone. Contrary to common wisdom, Ranma's reaction was the most subdued. The first thing he did was to raise his left eyebrow in a manner that any Star Trek fan or wrestling fan would know instantly. Seeing the question written clearly on Ranma's face, Hotaru said, "I have no idea. I never expected one of these things to attack this theater, much less looking like that!"
Hearing someone speaking in an unafraid tone, the Kyubi attacked Hotaru. Ranma responded to this attack on his Senshi by performing a flawless, if silent, Kagebunshin No Jutsu followed by an attempted beatdown on the monster. 'Hotaru, RUN!'
Sensing the confidence that radiated from the seven Ranmas, Hotaru flawlessly performed the first phase of the Saotome secret technique, albeit with a gleam in her eye. She tore off up the aisle shouting "RUN AWAY!"
Seeing Hotaru run from a fight with an expression worthy of Ranma, Setsuna said, "Saotome secret technique. All right, Girls! Time to go!"
Watching Setsuna finally drag Haruka out of the theater, the real Ranma turned to the Kyubi. Looking the beast over critically, Ranma said, "That's a new look fer ya, Taro. What'd ya do, take a dip in tha Spring of drowned Fox-Demon?"
Hearing Ranma's voice, Pantyhose Taro looked closely at the clones trying to kick his head. "And what of you, Fem-Boy? that's both a new look and a new trick."
Dispelling his clones, Ranma got right up in Taro's face. "Dammit, Taro! I'm gettin' tired of ya callin' me Fem-Boy. My name is Ranma! I'm trying not ta be specific about yer shame, so tha least ya can do is do me tha same favor!"
"Sorry, Ranma. I'm not good with names, so I tend to associate people with their most memorable feature. With you, it's the fact that you physically change gender. You're right, though. I did take a dip in that spring so that I'd be able to talk in beast form."
"Well why are ya here this time, Fox-Boy?"
Annoyed by Ranma's arrogance, Taro backhanded him into the wall above the projection window. As soon as he hit the wall, Ranma fell thirty feet to land....
...In a tangle of bedding beside his bed, having fallen out in his sleep. Realizing where he is, Ranma curses his luck at rolling out of bed in the middle of the night. 'Aw man! This sucks! I wish she'd listened when I told her that this would happen.'
Ranma is just about to get to the juicy swearing when his inner monologue is interrupted by Hotaru's voice in his head. 'Ranma, are you okay? You fell out of your bed again.'
'Yeah, I am. I'm just upset that my sleep was interrupted again. I warned Setsuna-Mama that I couldn't sleep in one of these monstrosities, and that if I didn't sleep through then I wouldn't get enough rest. Why'd she have to hide tha futons?'
Chuckling over his unconscious use of one of her phrases, Hotaru replies, 'Do you want me to sneak in and destroy that evil thing?'
'No! If you do that, she'll charge me ten times the value of the beastly thing. I'll just tell her that if I have ta sleep on a real bed, then I won't be rested enough to concentrate in school. I'm just glad that I'm allowed to speak aloud in civilian form.'
'Okay. May I ask what you were dreaming about?'
'Our first date, though the way I dreamed it ain't the way it happened.'
'Okay, but please try to get back to sleep.'
'I'll try, Hota-chan.'
'See ya later, Ranma-sama.'
Unable to suppress a shiver at the honorific, Ranma ponders how he came to be living down the hall from Hotaru Tomoe. 'It all started that day in the park. If not for that battle, I'd probably be dead of Akane's cooking by now. The date was amazing, but that just ain't how it happened. That date was a good three weeks before the growth spurt, and a year before the Telepathy started. Not to mention that it was only last week that I popped the question and our first kiss was the day before I proposed. The bit with Taro did happen, but he didn't look that much like the Kyubi.'
While Setsuna was explaining a bit of Ranma's background, the normally pigtailed boy and the girl who is his first real friend were watching the movie, or at least trying to. They kept stealing glances at each other in response to their thoughts, as well as something that neither knew about yet. though they didn't know it at the time, they were experiencing a mild form of Empathy, each sensing where on the emotional scale the other was. We'll start with Ranma's train of thought, then move onb to that of his date.
'How am I gonna get away from the crazies long enough to spend time with Hotaru? If Akane ever thinks there's sumthin' serious between Hotaru an' me, she'll kill me slowly an' painfully.'
This line of negative thought was stopped by Hotaru giving Ranma an unexpected squeeze around the shoulders. As soon as his brain rebooted, Ranma thought, 'That's a new one by me. I never get hugs, and the crazies back home would put me in traction if I hugged a girl other than them. Except Akane, that is. She'd put me in traction if I hugged anybody but my own mother. Nabiki would take me for everything I have, Pop would force me ta hurt him, and Mr. Tendo would break down in unmanly tears. This feels good. I can't help but wonder if Ucchan an' me would've ever hugged if I'd been able to stay with her?'
Ranma idly put an arm around Hotaru's shoulders as he continued, 'I just hope I can keep Hotaru out of the spotlight when it comes to my life, at least until I can straighten out the mess Pop made. I don't care what anybody says, I am not gonna marry Akane. If she really wanted me, she shouldn'a bashed me every chance she got. sometimes I wonder if she don't like girls that way instead a' guys. Come ta think of it, every time I see her and her two friends coming from somewhere nobody else is, they all seem to be glowing, and Nabiki even hinted that Akane was havin' sex with Yuka an' Sayuri. Lickety-Split, indeed! I almost wish I hadn't asked Dai what that meant.'
As Ranma got to the end of that thought, he blushed so fiercely that if he were in cursed form, you would have had trouble finding her hair at a glance.
While Ranma was mentally working up to Daisuke's graphic description of lesbian sex, Hotaru was lost in her own mental world.
'It feels good to watch a movie with someone who doesn't think I'm a freak. I hope we can do this often. Oh! Ranma needs a hug!' she thought, suiting action to thought.
Having squeezed Ranma's shoulders, Hotaru blushed to the roots of her hair. 'I can't believe I just did that!'
Hotaru's brain took a bit longer to reboot than Ranma's. In fact, she didn't start thinking rationally again until Ranma returned the hug.
'Whoa! that was an intense rush of "feel good"! I wonder if some of the things Michiru-Mama and Haruka-Papa do together feel even better? Never mind. I know they do, if the noise at night is any clue.'
At this point, Ranma and Hotaru sported identical blushes.
There was a crash from the side wall as what looked like a standard Sailor Moon MOTW smashed through it. Ranma looked Hotaru in the eye, thinking, 'Hotaru, RUN! I'll take care of this idiot!'
Hotaru ran, grabbing Usagi as she passed. "Let's get you out of here, Princess! Things are not what they seem here."
The rest of the Senshi followed, wondering what was going on.
When the theater was empty, Ranma stood up, revealing that he was not wearing his usual clothes. Instead he was wearing an outfit consisting of blue jeans, American athletic shoes, a white T-shirt, a blue denim vest, and a red and white baseball cap. (Picture Terry Bogard with Ranma's build and features, and you'll understand what happened next.) The monster took one look at the young man and started backing up. "Terry Bogard?! I didn't know you were Japanese!"
Realizing that Taro doesn't recognize him, Ranma decided to play the part well. After a fight scene that would not be out of place in a Fatal Fury video game, complete with Terry's special moves, Ranma walked out of the wrecked theater severely beaten but victorious.
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(Posted Wed, 12 May 2010 06:10)
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らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
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