"Uhm, Kakashi-sensei, what exactly happened to Sakura-chan?" asked Naruto. "Her pupils are all contracted, but her heartrate and respiration are WAY down."
"She should have come out of the genjutsu on her own," said Kakashi. "...and when did you study medicine?"
"That was about the time you pranked that crazy snake-woman," said Sasuke.
"Yeah! You remember that?" asked Naruto.
"It is burned into memory," said Sasuke.
"Oh? Should I ask?" asked Kakashi.
"My first view of a private woman's... privates," said Sasuke. "Then I got bit by a snake."
"A snake was in a woman's pri... This wouldn't happen to involve Anko Mitarashi would it?" asked Kakashi.
"Actually she was throwing snakes at Naruto and I was still dealing with the fact that she'd slipped and fallen on me," said Sasuke.
"She WAY overreacted to that," said Naruto.
"How do you even KNOW Anko Mitarashi?" asked Kakashi.
"I was hiding in a bush from another prank on someone else entirely, but they really deserved what happened to them!" protested Naruto.
"Naruto, NOBODY deserves talking toilet paper," said Sasuke. "There are lines which should never be crossed."
"Anko?" Kakashi asked, getting back to the point.
"Oh yeah," said Naruto. "She hit me with several pointy sticks while I was hiding. I vowed vengeance."
"Vengeance is important," acknowledged Sasuke. "Buttering her up for a prank though - normally does not involve real butter."
"You dumped warm butter on Anko Mitarashi? And you're still alive?" asked Kakashi.
"She fell on Sasuke at one point," said Naruto. "Wham! Nearly broke his nose."
"How..." asked Kakashi, his visible eye going wide.
"You'd think with a skirt that short she'd at least wear panties..." mumbled Sasuke.
"So back to Sakura," said Naruto. "Why's she like that - she's poisoned? What jutsu did you use on her?"
"The Hell Viewing Technique," said Kakashi thoughtfully. "What could she have seen so horrifying that she now thinks she's a tree? Unless..."
"Unless?" asked Naruto and Sasuke.
"If I moved the hand seals just a bit off, it becomes the Hentai Viewing Technique," said Kakashi. "But she's TWELVE, if it were that it shouldn't affect her at all unless she is destined to have a truly monstrous libido."
Naruto glanced down at Sakura. "Well, Sasuke, she's YOUR girlfriend..."
"Since when?" asked Sasuke.
"Well, since the time I asked her out for ramen and she told me that she'd rather be flayed alive and rolled in salt," said Naruto. "She got kinda graphic. Went on for five minutes. Grossed me out."
"That was when you saw Hinata standing there and asked her out," said Sasuke.
"And she fainted," said Naruto.
"She got better," said Sasuke.
"Well, mostly," agreed Naruto. "She almost drowned in her ramen when I complimented her on NOT fainting."
"Girls," summed up Sasuke, indicating exactly how much problem he thought the word encompassed just by tone.
"I hear ya," said Kakashi.
"Yeah," said Naruto. "So when's Sakura going to come out of it?"
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(Posted Fri, 29 Apr 2011 16:45)
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