The seven in the minutes slot clicked to a six as it faded out and the recorded episode ended.
"W-w-w-what?!" squeaked Haruhi.
"This sounds troublesome," offered Itsuki.
Kyon trained to exhaustion. Perhaps it was the way world he was in worked, perhaps it was the way Haruhi Suzumiya focussed on the images on her computer monitor. Perhaps it was something else. Whatever the cause, the training began to have immediate results.
Kyon ran a little bit further, a little bit faster, every day. Meditating seemed to come a little easier. To those who were used to the ninja lifestyle, it wasn't all that remarkable. To Kyon, who was going through it, it wasn't all that noticeable under all the pain and suffering.
He knew, after all, that things were already underway that would cause him all sorts of problems. It was pretty much in-genre.
"Try this," said Naruto, setting a bow, quiver, and set of arrows down.
"Where'd you get this?" asked the worlds-displaced student, examining them.
"Weapons shop a little ways from where I'm staying," said Naruto.
Kyon stopped his inspection. "How much did this cost?"
"Stay alive, contribute, and we'll discuss cost later," said Naruto.
Sasuke glanced over at the set and seemed to weigh whether it was more troublesome to say something or remain silent. "How'd you get the money for that?"
Naruto paused, apparently wondering if it was worth the effort to answer. "Fuuinjutsu. I know how to make simple wards and protective barriers. Did some work for the shop owner."
Sasuke considered that, tilting his head slightly.
"Anyway, it's not a top-of-the-line set, but it'll do to get you started. The green-fletched are simple arrows suitable for target practice. Red-fletched are chisel-point for creatures with a tough hide. No frog-crotch or trick arrows. Have to make those if you want 'em."
"'Fuuinjutsu'?" asked Kyon, thinking that sounded safer to work with than kunai.
"All of that will have to wait," said Kakashi, appearing in a puff of smoke. "Today's mission is... pulling weeds!"
"How exciting," said Sasuke, his voice indicating something other than complete honesty was being used there.
"I have some really," Kakashi paused here as if considering just the right word to use, "interesting training planned for this afternoon."
"Oh, that does NOT sound good," said Kyon.
"So did you hear about the contest?"
Yuki Nagato looked up. One of the Computer Club members? "Contest?"
"Your friend Koizumi was asking about one of the characters on 'Sword Of The Leaf' yesterday," said the nerd. "So have you seen the online contest?"
"No, I have not," answered Yuki softly. "Requesting information."
The Club member nodded, apparently taking this as his cue. "There's a website where you can decide what that Kyon guy's fate is. Apparently they're trying all sorts of things with this series - one of which is that they've got a 'soft script' - meaning if Kyon doesn't work out they can kill him off and put someone else in."
"You have the web address?" asked Yuki, not that she didn't think she needed help finding it with this level of information. It was just that it would proceed easier with more complete data.
"Uhm, yeah, I can have it for you at lunch," sort-of suggested the geek.
"That would be fine," said Yuki.
"This is... horrible," said Haruhi Suzumiya, looking over the website.
"I'll say," said Koizumi. "25 votes say turn him into Kyonko and let HER live. 22 votes say kill him off - he's annoying."
Yuki sat in front of the computer, her hands poised above the keyboard. She glanced up at Haruhi.
"What can we do about it though... Wait. What's THAT choice?" asked Haruhi, pointing at one near the bottom.
"Some sort of glitch in the program perhaps," said Yuki.
"Kyon ends up in a romantic relationship with Yuki Nagato?!" asked Haruhi. "Sounds VERY suspicious."
"Probably bad data," said Yuki without a hint of emotion.
"Uh huh," said Haruhi. "I notice it has ONE vote."
"My finger slipped," offered Yuki, the very picture of innocence.
"Uh huh," repeated Haruhi.
"Too bad you aren't in the series," said Itsuki.
"Indeed," said Yuki.
"Well, imagine if YOU were stuck in there, you'd be even worse at being a ninja than he is!" declared Haruhi.
'So, you got to eat lunch with Nagato?"
"Yeah, she does a freaking GREAT 'Mister Spock' imitation."
"Oh, didn't get anywhere with her, huh?"
"Let's just say I NEVER want to have to play poker against her."
"Oh darn. I thought she was cute. Hey, isn't that the site for the vote on that 'Kyon' guy?"
"Yeah, you can vote once per day per e-mail address. So I'm dropping another vote for him getting turned into 'Kyonko' and being the team kunoichi."
"I voted that he be thrown back to the Academy and they get a REAL kunoichi."
"Be sure to put in the comments she should be capable of Marshmallow Hell. Hmmm. That'd make an interesting ninja technique, wouldn't it?"
"What the - heck - is this? There's fifteen votes now for 'Romantic Relationship' with 'New Character' - fourteen of which are for a fuuinjutsu expert named Yuki Nagato?"
"Damn. Why didn't I think of that?"
"Are you nuts?"
"Picture Nagato in one of those sexy mesh kunoichi outfits."
"...It's not to late to change my vote. Ooh. Better yet - Asahina."
42 votes - Kyon gets a powerup as a direct result of a monster attack.
37 votes - flunked off Team 7, he spends the next six years in the Ninja Academy alongside a bunch of five year olds.
33 votes - Kyon dies on the mission.
27 votes - Kyon becomes 'Kyonko' - he gets permanently turned into a girl.
17 votes - Kyon, fuuinjutsu talent
17 votes - Kyon, genjutsu specialist
10 votes - powerful alien/esper/slider in his ancestry provides traits that activate when he's facing certain death.
5 votes - previous incarnation was an Exalt.
1 vote - god of mischief notices he was thrown there and makes him a deal.
15 votes - Romantic relationship with new character.
...14 votes for Yuki Nagato. (see comments)
"Go ahead and click on the last one, see what comments there are."
"Dang."
"That's Nagato-san all right, done up as a fuuinjutsu expert and cipher specialist. Dang. She's so moe like that."
"Wait a minute, what's with that new fate?"
"My hand slipped."
"Yuki? You added 247 votes to your option!"
Yuki pointed at the screen, in particular at the option that Haruhi had entered.
1 vote - Kyon returns to be a repentant slave to the goddess he spurned.
"What's wrong with that option?" asked Haruhi.
The three remaining members of the Brigade all looked at Haruhi without commenting.
"Oh, and that's really worse than Yuki's 'mistake'?" asked Haruhi, folding her arms in front of her and sniffing disdainfully.
Mikuru, Itsuki, and Yuki all nodded.
Read the comments on this episode
(Posted Wed, 05 Oct 2011 16:50)
Questions? Problems? Suggestions?
Send a mail to addventure@bast-enterprises.de
or use the contact form.
らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
All other series and their characters are © by their respective creators or owners. No claims of ownership of these characters are implied by the authors of this Addventure, or should be inferred.
The Anime Addventure is a non-profit site.