Thwip!
"Idiot," said an ANBU on the roof as an adult civilian was grabbed by a dark elf Academy student, dragged deeper into the alley, then forced into a submission hold where a threat of long excruciating and most of all painful death was promised if ANYTHING happened to Naruto Uzumaki was whispered into a particular ear.
The ANBU considered that briefly, with the dark elf going into detail. Of course, without a specific wind jutsu to carry the whisper to her ears - she couldn't have heard that. As it was she was awarding the child points for anatomical accuracy and imagination. She might just have a future in T&I and it was worth forwarding the encounter to Ibiki's office.
Not for the child to be punished, of course. She was showing several qualities that were in short supply among the ninja-candidates lately.
Ah, the one the adult civilian had been speaking to was now investigating and finding only that adult. Nice touch, that fading into the shadows. Leave them guessing about what might be in the shadows and ready to pounce.
Yes, that girl might just have potential.
Hiruzen Sarutobi looked at Naruto. Naruto looked back.
"I got a harem?" asked Naruto. "Wow. That's interesting."
The Hokage nodded.
"What's a harem?"
"Do you want the definition the girls are using, or the older definition?" asked the old man in the corner.
"Uhm, the first one?" asked Naruto.
"A group of girls who are associated with a particular boy," said the old man.
"Oh," said Naruto. "Am I in trouble?"
"No, not yet," said the old man. "I expect THAT to hit in about two to four years."
"Oh," said Naruto. "Waitaminute. So it's like all those girls who hang around Sasuke? They're a harem too, ain't they?"
"Why did I get the sudden urge to hit Naruto?" asked Sakura.
Ino considered using the opening to insult her former friend, but then shrugged and decided to try an honest answer. "Habit?"
The old man stroked his chin, looking thoughtful for a few moments. "I suppose that might be true. Depending on how you look at things."
"So I really AM Sasuke Uchiha's rival," said Naruto, sitting back in his chair. All the girls had been all about Sasuke, the teachers had all (mostly) been favoring towards Sasuke, overheard comments from parents picking up their kids had also been positive towards Sasuke. Ever since that one day with taijutsu practice he'd had that idea about being Sasuke's rival. So here was confirmation.
Naruto really didn't understand why the old guy started scribbling out notes, but decided to just focus on the fact that he wasn't in trouble.
"So what do I get as a member of this 'harem'?" asked Tenten.
"All of us train each other in anything but clan-specific techniques," said the dragon-girl Ryuuko. "A number of us have special abilities of our own, and can provide suitably powerful opponents. If one of us has a family business or input on such, we can negotiate discounted rates for other members. Three of us have already managed such."
"Really?" asked Tenten, thinking that 'harem' was an odd word and it basically being a fanclub of that summoning-kid was also odd. Discounts and extra training sounded good though. "What stores?"
"The ninja clothier Tetsumi's Textiles, Silverleaf Apothecary, and the grocer down the block - Lin's Market."
Tenten considered that, and that the actual "cost" of membership would be having to train some younger girls - maybe negotiate things with her father so that the mark-up for new goods was at a lower profit margin. Of course, if this group got bigger and they all came for kunai and other weaponry...
"Okay," said Tenten. "Let's see how well this works out."
"Lady Hinata has joined a harem."
"What have you been smoking, and why aren't you sharing?"
"No, I'm serious."
"She's twelve and near-terminally shy. If she ever so much as kissed a boy, I'd expect her to damn near fall into a coma."
"Well, they're using an odd definition of 'harem' more like a cooperative fanclub."
The one branch member of the Hyuga clan looked at the other branch member of the Hyuga clan. "Okay. So - not the sort of harem like that guy from Kiri."
"No, definitely not," admitted the other branch member. "If it had looked anything like that, I'd have stepped in."
"Okay, so it's news we can spring on the clan head when he's drinking something, then when he's choking explain that it's really something innocent? I like it already."
Not that there was any resentment from branch clan members to the main branch of the Hyuga clan. No, of course not. Those were just rumors spread by less than informed commoners.
"Yeah, it's just a bunch of girls who like one particular boy and cooperating in an effort to get stronger."
The older of the two nodded thoughtfully. "Well, cooperation IS one of the founding tenets of Konohagakure. Pity we don't see more of it, other than in teams. So, what's the other shoe?"
"Pardon me?"
The older sighed as if much put-upon. "The other shoe. What's the part you haven't told me?"
"Oh, the one they like is Naruto Uzumaki."
"Not surprising," said the older drily. "He went from being loud-mouthed untalented prankster to someone who engineered an entirely new kind of fuuinjutsu. Has the ear of the Hokage. I heard the other day that he considered himself the rival of that Uchiha kid."
"Oh, how about that most of them are those nonhuman types?"
"Also not surprising," said the older Hyuga. "I heard the details of that jutsu of his. He rescues 'em from certain death to pull them here, and I heard some of 'em have got special kekkei genkai that are likely to become clans of their own. He's actually making some converts among the civilians as word circulates."
"Oh, hadn't heard that," admitted the younger.
"It's hard to think of someone as a bloodthirsty demon in disguise when his primary accomplishment is a 'save girls from certain death' jutsu," said the older with a shrug.
Danzo groaned slightly, stirring from his bed.
"DANZO-SAMA!" yelled a member of ROOT, bursting in the door.
"Hmph. Report," said Danzo, knowing that he wasn't to be interrupted unless something major was going on.
"The Hokage has given permission for Uzumaki to try his summoning array again, in order to check an experiment in the filter conditions."
"Does that actually make any sense?" asked Danzo.
"As I understand it, Danzo-sama, yes," said the ROOT operative. "The boy has been experimenting with a variant to summon equipment, and came up with an idea for improving the parent jutsu. That sort of thing does happen."
"Put that way, yes," admitted Danzo. One worked on a jutsu, came up with a variant, and then used the knowledge learned to make improvements in the original. "What does this filter do?"
"He's going to try and summon someone who is a hero this time," said the ROOT worker. "Or a princess. He was babbling a bit at the time."
"Pfeh. Worthless," said Danzo. "Be sure to sabotage the papers he's written them out on. We don't need more powerful freaks in the village."
"I got the message. What have we got?" said Tenten, walking into the club room. (Which was actually the lot and receiving office behind Tetsumi's Textiles.) Shiroko sat back on her white serpent's tail and gestured towards a large box.
"What?" asked Tenten, going over and lifting the lid. She came to a complete stop on seeing what was in there.
"None of them really appeal to me or ojo-sama," said Shiroko. "There are only twelve anyway. Yet this is Naruto-sama's first attempt to make sure we are equipped properly."
"Ooooh," said Tenten, lifting the weapon and checking heft and balance. "Shiny!"
"As you have already graduated the Academy and are in the field, it was decided that you should be one of the first to choose," said Shiroko.
"All right," said Naruto, clapping his hands. "Let's see if... hang on. This is wrong. Okay."
Glancing up at the Hokage from the correction he'd made in the array, Naruto gave a thumb's up and began the test.
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(Posted Fri, 27 Jul 2012 21:15)
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らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
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