The sight of his daughter Ayame with batwings and horns and tail was a bit odd. Though he'd mostly gotten used to seeing her with a tail and fuzzy ears prior to this.
"Welcome to the Castle Hidden In The Forest First Annual Ramen Festival!" boomed a voice.
Teuchi had not been idle on the sidelines for the years they'd been trapped here. He'd TRIED to do so, but he kept getting dragged into the middle of things. Or 'muddle of things' - which might be more accurate.
"Forward! For the honor of Tetsumaki's Noodles!"
"Amateur," said Teuchi as the attacker ran straight into Ayame's "Mega Fire" technique. He idly used a pot lid to block a thrown senbon, then replied with napkin-shuriken. "The festival just opened, morons."
"That is why we undercut the competition," stated the senbon thrower, stepping out of the shadows.
"The contest isn't until the third day," pointed Teuchi, blocking more senbon with the same pot lid. "If you eliminate someone now, they'll have recovered by the time the contest rolls around."
The senbon-user stopped in mid-throw. "Oh."
"Timing is at least as important as the ingredients," said Teuchi. "Don't you know that much?"
"Well, yes, but the preparation is surely as important," argued the senbon-user.
WHAM! went Ayame's kick to the back of the senbon-user's head.
"That would be the case-in-point," said Teuchi to the prone opponent.
"I didn't expect that," said Naruto.
Mitsuki, a level 75 Professor who happened to look and dress like all the other Professors except that her lab coat was white with a 'Mad Scientists Local Union #235' sign on the back, adjusted her glasses. "Why not? It was certainly predictable based on analysis of demonic tastes thus far."
"Gunpowder Ramen?" asked Naruto, making a face.
"It was a Baciel, or Rifle Demon, running the stall," pointed out Mitsuki. "You noticed it was mainly Gunners and Baciel lining up to buy there, correct?"
"So I should look over the demons buying ramen at a stall and figger out whether the ramen is weird at that stall or not?" asked Naruto.
The Professor nodded.
"Okay," said Naruto. There was a stall with Eryngi, those walking mushroom guys, lining up to eat there.
[Mushroom Warrior bill can now be passed in Senate.]
"Eh?" asked Naruto.
"Eh, what?" asked Mitsuki.
"Apparently if I pass a bill through the Senate, I can now recruit Eryngi," said Naruto.
Mitsuki considered this for a moment. "Why would you want to?"
"True," said Naruto.
"They're only lining up at that stall because the staff are all Nekomata and Succubi going Hadaka Apron," said Mitsuki, giving a little sniff at the end to indicate her thoughts on such matters.
Naruto checked out the next stall. Catsaber and Nekomata lined up to buy ramen there. "I'm guessing fish ramen."
"Most likely," agreed Mitsuki. "There's Gonzalez at the next stall."
Naruto wondered how Mitsuki could instantly tell that one Orc in the line of Orcs was one of his Orcs. "Uhm. What do Orcs eat?"
"Orc food is usually undercooked, or in this case, alive," said Mitsuki.
"Huh?" asked Naruto before checking out the dining area and finding that at least one Orc was in danger of being consumed by his meal rather than the other way around. "That isn't one of mine is it?"
"No," said Mitsuki after looking carefully at the single Orc that was losing the fight against his ramen.
"Good," said Naruto, relieved. He turned his gaze to the next one. "Fortuneteller?"
"Ah, yes, a mystic sort, Marie LeVoom," said Mitsuki. "She apparently has a high rate of accuracy."
"Maybe she has an idea of how to get home," said Naruto, heading towards the booth.
Hiruzen Sarutobi saw Naruto and that female Professor type entering the stall. "Fortuneteller? In a Ramen Festival?"
"Ah, Marie LeVoom. Bringing up data," said his current companion, one of the Androids named Ho-Ni. "Healer classification, Elite unit. Ability to use Clairvoyant abilities using a variety of media - dependant on environment."
"So she likely sees the future in a bowl of ramen?" asked Hiruzen.
"Calculating 98.477% chance," said Ho-Ni.
"You just make those statistics up, don't you?" asked Hiruzen.
"Affirmative. Percentage given is simply an indication of how much certainty this unit has in prediction of events."
"Well, let's see what Naruto is up to, shall we?" asked Hiruzen.
"Affirmative," said Ho-Ni.
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(Posted Mon, 27 Aug 2012 06:27)
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