“Of all the unbelievable, idiotic, insulting...” the Snake Sannin grumbled as he washed his hands in one of the sinks in the movie theater’s men’s washroom. Upon coming back with more treats from the concession bar, that idiot kunoichi tripped and dropped a large soda all over him! Didn’t that idiot know how difficult it was to work sugary drinks out of silk!? Oh yes, he wasn’t so apt to throw away his conditioned followers—Otogakure was still far from becoming reality—he sure as hell couldn’t keep Shiroko around after THIS blunder. Oh no. Only blood would appease his irritability now. Maybe he could stuff her corpse in the popcorn machine during the intermission...
The orphan prodigy paused in his mental machinations of maiming that misbegotten miscreant when his senses flared. Having been born and raised through the Second Great Ninja War and a veteran of the Third, his ability to just know when danger was upon him was honed as a keen edge. Immediately, he looked up from the sink and saw the source of the presence. “You know Jiraiya, you’re not doing a good job of spying right now...” he told the white-haired individual who stood directly behind him.
Shrugging his shoulders, the man trained by Ma and Pa Toad deftly replied, “Wasn’t that hard. I was already scanning the audience for reactions to the movie; study what they like and do what I can to incorporate improvements into the next one...” he smirked a little as he bluntly stated, “And you weren’t doing all that much to go unnoticed. You were being quite uppity.”
A frown creased Orochimaru’s otherwise porcelain features. “Well, excuse me for being so ‘uppity’,” the Missing-Nin sneered at his former teammate. “But I don’t take kindly to people beneath my level thinking they can get away with making a mockery of me!” he normally calm and collected mad genius shouted angrily in a way that was more suited to the Kunoichi of the Sannin.
Taking a step back, the Toad Sage was surprised at the accusation. He had expected an epic showdown to take place, for teammate to face teammate in a fight to the finish, introductions and showboating before trying to slice open each others’ necks... not... THIS! “What... what the hell are you talking about?” the white-haired Fuuinjutsu Master shouted back at the pretty-boy that used to show him up all the time.
“Oten!” the lithe figure in dark robes snapped. “OTENMARU!”
Jiraiya blinked his eyes once, twice, thrice. “...Come again?”
With a fluid motion, the Snake Sannin took a step forward towards his former partner, glaring him in the eyes. “Don’t act dumb with me! I know you’re an idiot most of the time but not when it comes to something like this! I know exactly what you’re doing!” His slit pupils narrowing, he accused, “You purposely based Otenmaru on me, didn’t you? DIDN’T YOU!?”
Again, the Toad Sage had to blink his eyes, trying to come to turns with what the snake bastard had just said. Slowly but surely, a smile started to tug at the corners of his lips; the man had to fight back a chortle. “You... you think I based him on you!?” Come to think of it, now that even HE thought about it, Jiraiya could see the similarities. “Oh... oh that IS rich!” Hands on his hips, the man threw his head back in boisterous laughter.
“Stop it!” Orochimaru shouted as he stomped a foot. “STOP LAUGHING!”
He really didn’t mean to laugh in the supposed Kinjutsu Genius’ face, really he didn’t—such was suicidal after all—but the more he thought about it, the more it just struck the lone loyal Sannin as positively hilarious. “I—HAHAHAA! Oh, I’m sorry!” the white-haired Nin managed to apologize as he laughed even harder, having to bring a hand up to his face to wipe a tear from his eye. “But I see the old saying’s true! Life imitates art and art imitates life!”
His hands clenching into fists so hard that his fingernails started to draw blood from his palms, Orochimaru started to take on a human skin tone for once as he suddenly became red in the face; the normally cool and collected killer becoming infuriated at the fool’s joviality. “Stop it! Stop laughing!” the Snake Sannin demanded as he concentrated his killing intent on his former teammate.
Immediately, all laughter died as the severity of the situation came crashing down like a sack full of bricks. His smile immediately forming into a grimace, the Toad Sage met the Snake’s nasty gaze full-on, putting out a bit of his own killing intent to counter-act his former teammates. “Fine. I stopped laughing,” he huffed firmly as he glared back. “What the hell are you doing in the Fire Country? Don’t you know they’ll kill you if they find you here?”
His Killing Intent toning back a little, now it was Orochimaru who couldn’t help but smirk a little. “What’s this? Still showing concern for your old teammate?” He tsk’ed as he shook his head. “Still as soft-hearted as ever I see...” his eyes narrowed. “Is that why you made a fictional caricature of me? Did you miss your ‘old buddy’?” he scoffed. “Pathetic!”
“Believe me, Snake-teme,” Jiraiya snorted back. “That such happened was anything but intentional. I’m just the sort that writes what he knows, you know? That I decided to make the first outright villain... well... a lot like you of all people, goes to say something about your selfish personality, doesn’t it!?” the white-haired Nin quickly bit out that last part like a curse, trying to keep the Konoha exile occupied. One-on-one, he might be able to take the bastard down—Jiraiya was always better in Taijutsu—but if Orochimaru started summoning his snakes, the lives of everyone in the theater would be endangered!
So no, a fight wasn’t in the cards, this time. He had to diffuse the situation now. “You gotta admit though... he suits you.”
Orochimaru didn’t look all that impressed. “...Come again?” he replied, toning his aura back a little. While still angered, he was curious as to what the fool was aiming at. Was he setting him up for an ambush or what?
“Well, think about it!” Jiraiya replied with a surprising amount of enthusiasm. “Otenmaru is someone with god complex and values himself and his skills while delighting in striking terror into the hearts of the masses, especially when making his first impression as we saw with Gruff McSnarl. He’s someone that causes conflict to ease his boredom, his charisma attracting a number of followers... many of which he would not hesitate to send on potential suicide missions if for his own personal benefit, due to having no sentimental attachments to any of them despite their values. Despite this, Otenmaru has genuine interest in the development of his underlings and experiments as they help him reach another step in his goal of immortality and learning every technique in the world!”
A smug smile on his face, the Toad Sage quickly replied, “And doesn’t that sound like an astoundingly awesome villain to you? If not, I don’t know what does!”
The future head of Otagakure wanted to rebuttal this, really he did... but the more he carefully considered the words of his teammate, the more it made sense. Yes, Otenmaru was obviously ripping him off—even if the oaf claimed that was not the intention at the time—but Jiraiya had a point. When it came to being so masterfully evil, was there anyone truly more dastardly heinous than himself? True, it wouldn’t win him any positive acknowledgement or prestige, but there was something to be said to the reputation and respect fear could gain a person.
It was after a long internal debate that Orochimaru decided he could live with this; hell, on some level he actually LIKED being portrayed as the shadowy master epic villain. What was the old saying in literature? Ah, yes, the fiendish nin thought with a bit of delight. The villain always gets to have more fun along the way.
A small, devious chuckle escaped the Missing-Nin’s lips. “Kukuku... you always were a fast talker, Jiriaya...” he shook his head as he turned about. “Very well. I’ll leave you to your little cartoons... this time...” Left unsaid however, was just because he wasn’t going to personally do anything to the blasphemous buffoon, didn’t mean he was going to let the initial insult slide, oh no. That wasn’t his style. Perhaps hiring an attack squad of Kiri ninja to kill Jiraiya would get the point across that you didn’t mess with Oten—OROCHI! Yes... it would get the point across that you didn’t mess with Orochimaru, the Snake Sannin!
Watching as the man turned to leave the restroom, Jiraiya knew he should let him go; yes, he was in Konoha’s Bingo Book, but this was neither the time nor place for such a fateful encounter. Still, the Toad Sage couldn’t help but call out, “Orochimaru! Wait!”
Pausing in his steps, the Missing-Nin looked over his shoulder. “...Yesss?” he hissed out his response in a very snake-like fashion. “What is it?”
Taking a couple of steps towards the retreating form of his ex-teammate, the man asked, “Orochi-kun—”
“Don’t call me that!” the pale-skinned nin snapped irritably.
Wincing, the beefier of the two individuals nodded his head before trying again, “Orochimaru, I need to know. You were one of the greats, so why? Why did you betray Konoha like you did?”
“Betray? BETRAY!?” the Snake Sannin snarled. “They betrayed ME!” he turned about with a flourish, making his coat waft; Jiraya’s eyes quickly catching sight of the red clouds that adored the man’s garment. “Let me tell you something, dobe! I have always been this way, I was merely good at hiding it. But when that old fool Sarutobi finally retired and named Minato Namikaze his successor, I saw no more reason to be discreet with my actions. After all, what face did I need to show to the public if I wasn’t going to be on display like a puppet on a stage!”
Eyes narrowed, Jiriaya quickly accused, “You murdered sixty CHILDREN!”
Pushing off the roar with a wave of his hand, Orochimaru was quick to reply, “What I did WAS for the good of Konohagakure! Yes, my experimentation to cultivate Hashirama Senju’s DNA in sixty children to recreate the Shodaime’s Wood Release techniques, was a failure at the time, but I knew I could succeed if I kept trying! After all, I HAD already done so with Danzou...”
It felt like a ball of lead dropped into the Toad Sage’s stomach. “Danzou? Danzou Shimura?”
Smirking a bit as he saw an opportunity to vent some of his anger by screwing over someone else, Orochimaru was quick to reply, “Quite. He was the first success and I knew there would be others. However, as I said before, I was less discreet with my actions as I no longer had to worry about becoming the Hokage, and I was caught red-handed by Hiruzen... who knew it was his duty to kill me yet lacked the will to do so.” His eyes narrowed. “So really, what was the point in staying? I was becoming too big for the small-minded lot of you, so the only thing left was to carve out my own niche in the world.”
“Damn it!” Jiraiya cursed, both at his former teammate’s nonchalance and the fact Konoha had such a traitor in their midst; whether he was referring to the Snake of the War Hawk even he couldn’t tell at the moment. “DAMN IT!” He cursed again. “You saw that Hiruzen didn’t want you to get in trouble! We could have tried to keep things quiet! Why didn’t you reconsider!?” the white-tressed man demanded to know. “Yes, what you did was awful! Truly horrific! But what you did to those who cared for you was worse! In leaving Konoha you not only emotionally broke sensei, but with my pleas for you to reconsider falling on deaf ears...” he trailed off, getting caught up in the memory of that day.
“Your pleas fell on deaf ears because I knew they would be no help,” the ebony-tressed nin replied. “Hiruzen and you were willing to forget, but what about your student, what of the Yondaime?” he sneered. “Oh no. If anything, the Yellow Flash would have seen me tried for what I’d done. At best, I’d have been convicted for treason and summarily executed. At worse, I would been put on trial for crimes against humanity and become a permanent residence of the T&I private penitentiary!” he turned about once more. “Besides, I’m better off now.”
It was with a heavy heart that Jiraiya sighed. “Orochimaru, you truly are a selfish jackass.”
Shrugging his shoulders, the Snake Sannin agreed, “Of course I am, but you would never understand why. That is YOUR failing. I am not one to allow something as irrational as emotion guide me. That is the sort of thing the old fool and you would do...” he frowned, something sparking behind those reptilian eyes of his. “Or Tsunade, who is still running from her childish fears...” he shook his head, as if trying to dispel something. “No. It doesn’t matter. Do whatever you want Jiraiya; write stories about little cartoon animals who spout such trite as the Will of Fire. So go ahead, let your emotion tell you to let me go... because no matter what, I know I’m on the proper path, even if I’m the only one who can see it.”
As he turned his back to Jiraiya and made his way to leave the restroom, Orochimaru knew it was quite the exit he prepared for himself on the fly; solemn and serious. The kind of stuff that would be used to end the chapters of those silly stories his former ally wrote. If the dobe was going to base a character on him, then he might as well give the fool a dose of what the REAL Orochimaru was like...
...It was just too bad the whole effect was ruined when the door to the men’s room swung open and slammed him in the face with enough force to break his nose.
“Great and powerful Master Orochimaru!” the dark-skinned blonde shouted as she held the door opened. “What is taking you so long? The movie’s getting out and you didn’t get to see the... ending...” she trailed off, blinking her eyes at the sight before her. “Master! What happened!? Your nose is all twisted and bloody? Did you have another accident?”
Cringing as he brought his right hand to his face, the Missing-Nin gripped the bridge of his nose tightly and turned it inward with an audible crunch. “Shikoro...”
The former Kumo Kunoichi smiled. “Yes, oh wise and benevolent Master?”
“Just... just go to the lobby, I’ll meet you there...” he hissed through his teeth as he worked through the pain of aligning his nose properly.
Grinning brightly, the girl nodded her noggin like a bobble-head doll. “Okey dokey, Master Orochi! I’ll see you here!” she chirruped before closing the bathroom door.
Glaring at the entrance of the men’s washroom, the Missing-Nin slowly turned to look over his shoulder at the face of his old teammate; a face that was bright red from trying to hold in laughter. “One word,” Orochimaru said warningly. “One word, and I will make it one of my life’s goals to destroy you and everything you love...”
When it seemed like the toad-worshipping oaf wasn’t going to say anything, Orochimaru nodded his head firmly and pulled the door open harshly, before stepping out of the bathroom; hand firmly slamming the door closed behind him.
Standing there in the washroom for a moment more, a small smirk worked its way across Jiraiya’s features as he was able to suppress the laughter finally. It would seem that his old teammate fell in with a really bad crowd after leaving Konoha if the robes were anything to go by... but he was at least relieved to see that there was SOMEONE with his old friend; hopefully they could help him keep his humanity. “Man, I have GOT to work that into the series...”
Walking alongside his partner, a seemingly teenage boy with wide brown eyes and short-cropped red hair raised an eyebrow... as much as it would raise anyway. Decked out in robes much like that of the Snake Sage’s with fingernails painted teal, he was someone who could both blend in with the crowd yet stand out all the same. Yet, to him, something else about his partner was standing out even more: and he didn’t mean the young girl following them. “So...” he spoke up with a careful tone. “Are you going to tell me how you broke your nose?”
“SHUT UP!”
“Hey, Mister Puppet-Man!” the young Kunoichi chirruped. “Did you know that Master is the greatest bard of the Land Of Flowers and performs charity concerts for the blind?”
That time, Sasori’s other eyebrow shot up to meet the other, giving him a gaze that looked like he was fully awake for once,
Seething with unbridled fury, the Snake Sannin could only bark out, “Just... just shut up!” Oh yes, first chance he got, this girl was getting scrapped!
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(Posted Mon, 24 Jun 2013 23:55)
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