It's Elementary, my dear! [Episode 333]

by Ryoko

Eyes glowing weirdly, Ranma paced the dojo. His shawl played out behind him like the finest London Fog trenchcoat, and the Chinese Emperor’s hat, from some discarded school play of Akane’s with its pom-poms on a string that wobbled wildly when he turned around importantly, gave him a somewhat dignified, if silly air. Grasping Happosai’s pipe in one hand and putting the other behind his back, Ranma strode the length of the dojo, pausing here and there to mutter occasionally. He would stop, point the pipe stem at one of his many wide-eyed suspects and then say something to the effect of “No, but that cannot work because of the fishcakes.”

Akane, Nabiki and Kasumi stood in a small knot to one side, looking at each other. “You know, Akane, I do believe that Ranma has gone insane.” Nabiki said sardonically. “If he keeps this up, I think he’s going to start talking back to his girl side.”

Kasumi nodded slowly. “He does seem to be taking this rather seriously, Akane, and as his fiancee, it’s your job to…”

"MY job? What do you mean my job? I never wanted this!” At the looks her sister was giving her, Akane relented. “Oh, all right, but remember, I wanted nothing to do with this!” And with that, she marched over to where Ranma was pacing, muttering and gesticulating. In her gentlest voice, she asked “Ranma, what’s going on?”

Ranma froze at the sound of Akane’s voice and spun on his heel. He pointed the pipe at Akane and in a booming voice, so that the rest of the crowd in the dojo could hear, said “Ah, you have come, Akane. So, tell me. Where were you from 8:45 P.M. to 5:23 A.M. on the evening last? Well, girl? Speak up! Hurry, I haven't got all day!”

Flabbergasted, she replied, "Um...er...that is...I was here, at the dojo.”

"A likely story! Come now, tell the truth, and we all shall be relieved to go home!” And with that, Ranma made a sweep of his hand that ended in a little flourish and included the entire room of people, all avidly watching Akane for her reaction to his statement. Several pairs of eyes had a look of malicious triumph in them that snapped Akane out of her stupor.

"Ranma no baka!" And with that, she whacked him clear through the roof, a new Ranma-sized hole appearing next to several older ones, still waiting for the contractors to come.

All business, Nabiki quickly began taking bets for where exactly in Tokyo, or if in Tokyo at all, he would land.

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(Posted Thu, 27 Mar 2003 04:10)


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