It was slow days for Toltiir. The normal chaos that was all abundant was enough to keep him fed, so he rarely ventured out into creating his own miscief... Much...
Of course, things had been rather slow lately. His little tavern in the heavens got little traffic nowadays... What with not many Gods or Goddesses paying much attention to him anymore. Sure, he did get occassional visits from Bastet, Eris,Elistree, Loki, Pan, and sometimes even Sehkmet, Sif, and Thor once in a great while... However, his little nook in Asgard was more or less quiet these days.
And that just drove Toltiir crazy...
Fortunately, he was not along today. Bastet, Egyptian Goddess of Cats, Men, Children, Pregnant women, and Pleasure was here with him. She sat at an empty booth, nursing a catnip and tomato juice drink with just a pinch of salt. Toltiir was washing tables.
"So, Toltiir..." Bastet began, picking up and studying the little paper umbrella that was in her drink, "How have things been for you lately?"
Shrugging his shoulders, the smaller cat-like God said, "Same old, Same old. Spend most of my time alone here, causing a bit of mischief for the mortals every once in awhile... The usual..."
Bastet nodded her head. "Been awhile since anything new happened..."
Toltiir nodded his head in agreement. But what could he do? Sure, he always caused chaos, but even that can lose it's charm when you always include the same person... "I need to get new customers..."
"Agreed." Bastet said, then finishing her drink. "This place has been rather dead for quite some time.
It was then the door above the entrance rang as the door opened slowly. Bastet and Toltiir turned their heads. They saw a rather tall, lanky man in white robes. The dark brown beard and thorn of crowns on his head were a dead give-away as to who he was. Bastet an Toltiir's jaws dropped.
"JESUS CHRIST," Bastet said in shock. "It's... Er... Jesus Christ!"
Toltiir speechless. Her was father's 'right-hand son' in Western religion. The man who was practically THE Good Book. "Jesus... What brings you to my neck of the woods?"
Sighing, Jesus said, "This is the fourth time today someone's surprised to see me. I mean, come on! I do live here too, you know!"
"Yeah, but you're rather... reclusive..." Bastet said.
Jesus shrugged his shoulders. "No, I just travel a lot. I mean, I have to make all these appearances and visions too. Like that time I appeared ina chile bowl in Texas..."
"I'm surprised Father lets you go out as much..." Bastet said.
Jesus leveled a look a Bast. "Darn it! I am over 2000 years old! I can take care of myself just fine!" With a sigh, Jesus walked over to a table and sat down. However, he noticed another structure near his table "Um, Toltiir," Jesus began. "If I may man an inquiery... What's that?"
The God of Mischief looked at where Jesus was pointing at and smirked lightly. After a moment, he answered with, "Oh, that's nothing too special. Just a special scrying well where I held my little contest with other Gods and Goddesses. We were trying to create a whole new, and hopefully, better reality for someone."
"How did you do that?" Jesus asked.
"Well, Jesus, each of us would toss a rock into the well, and with every ripple that was caused by the splash, a change would be made to alter the timeline and reality of the person we were watching. Of course, the main timeline would be unaffected but we had a bit of fun creating those other timelines."
"Interesting... So who won?" Jesus asked.
"The Goddess Titania; had a rather interesting reality with Ranma and the Tendos as Sailor Senshi..." Toltiir replied as he watched Jesus lean over from his table to the well and look into its depths.
Bastet got up form her table and walked over to Jesus's table. "I take it Toltiir's old pet project has caught your attention?" "Yes. I mean, this is rather... Beautiful..." Jesus said as he watched the various images and sounds of the timelines as they swirled about and danced about, colliding with each other. "I can feel the pain, the happiness, the excitment, and the chaos of the life of this 'Ranma'..."
Jesus then smiled got an idea. "Hey, Toltiir, if it is all right with you... May I give it a try?"
Now hearing Jesus 'Plain Vanilla' Christ say that was a rather surprising action to Toltiir and bastet. "What!?"
Nodding his head, Jesus said, "I want to make a timeline for this Ranma."
Toltiir thought about this for several minutes until Toltiir came to a decision. "You might want to reconsider! You're a little young and inexperienced to be messing around with the space-time continuum.
Jesus leveled a glare at Toltirr. "I'm two thousand years old!"
"Still young by our terms." Toltirr said. "And in any case, the Bet's been over for a long time now. Titania won. We're not going to be creating any new realities with that well anyway."
Seeing Jesus give Toltirr the sad, hurt puppy dog eyes look, Bastet felt a tiny bit of sympathy. So she decided to help him put. "Oh, have a heart, Toltiir. You let Rowan, Zora, and myself do it. You even let that rather nice Kasumi Tendo in on it." Bastet smirked. "Hell, even that dumb ditz Mihoshi got a turn!"
Jesus nodded his head. "Right! So please? Pretty please? Pretty please with sugar on top, Ice cream in the middle, lots of nougaught and-"
"All right, all right already!" Toltiir snapped. He couldn't take any more of this. It got annoying really quickly. He then stepped up to the well and began informing Jesus on the life they would be affecting.
"The person whom life we will be affecting is one Ranma Saotome. Since you're already cosmically aware, you should be able to understand the main points of his original timeline...
((AN: Mostly because this author doesn't want to write out all the crap we authors already know about Ranma's life.))
Toltiir made sure Jesus paid attention. "Now all you have to do is throw in a rock to cause a change in his life at some point in his timeline. Now since the Bet's already over, whatever timeline you make won't be of any consequence to the rest of reality since it will be eventually deleted... Or should... There have been circumstances of alternate realities solidifying..."
Jesus smiled and picked up a pebble from the dirt floor. He then gently tossed in the first rock. "I'll bet that this will be a great timeline!"
Leaning over, Toltiir, Bastet, and Jesus watched the scenes on the well distort and change.
And so, the Bet begins once more...
Looks like Ranma has a new father... (Fate Split, please.)
"I like Ukyo better!" (Fate Split, please.)
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(Posted Fri, 18 Apr 2003 21:34)
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