Analysis summary.
Subject is Human, Male, Age: 16, Racial subpheno: Japanese.
89% chance that subject is a martial artist.
Possibility for epic quest/adventures: 20%+
Manner of speech/dress indicate probability of low financial status. Used OK?
"Uhm," said Ranma, "can I see one?" How could they make androids that looked just like people? Or mainly like people?
"Certainly," said Kumiko.
Without any apparent signal from a sales rep, a Scottish Terrier entered from some swinging doors in the back and sat down in front of Ranma.
Then the fur of his chest opened up to reveal metal and plastic.
"Robot dogs?!" Ranma asked, a little freaked since he hadn't realized that it was an android prior to the chest-opening.
"Aye, laddie," said the dog in a thick Scottish accent. "I be a Faithful Cybernetic Companion unit. FCC-3147-K9 at yoir service." The chest closed on its own. "Oi, it be a bit drafty with that open."
Ranma blinked as he tried to figure out where the seam had been.
"Most of our units are of a human styling, but from your manner of clothing, we computed an 89% chance that you were a martial artist," said Kumiko. "Analysis of such fare as Samurai Showdown and various series indicates that an animal companion is acceptable. We also have purely mechanical looking Droid units and vehicle chassis - though these tend to stand out a lot more."
"Yeah, well, I'm looking for a gift," said the uncertain Ranma. "I dunno. Isn't this kinda like slavery or something?"
"Not at all," said Kumiko. "While our units are perfectly capable of independent thought and action, being fully capable artificial intelligences, they are androids and not completely human psychologically. They are happiest when they are performing their functions and being useful. The need to belong, along with this need to be useful, are higher priorities for an android than for a biological human."
Ranma had a sudden suspicion. "You're one of 'em?"
Kumiko hesitated but nodded. "I'm a fully functional Protocol unit, and know over 3000 languages."
"I see," said Ranma, thinking that sounded like an awful lot. On the one hand, he couldn't see Ryouga topping a gift like this. On the other hand, Akane might have a fit if he brought a cute girl home - even if it wasn't a real girl and she was a gift for Kasumi.
"What kind of person is the gift for?" Kumiko asked, reading the biosigns and determining that the boy was wrestling with indecision.
"Uhm, well, she's a cook and she keeps the house and stuff and I've seen she reads medical books and stuff, and uhm," Ranma tried to figure out how to describe Kasumi. "She's nice but not all there if ya know what I mean. I mean she'll seem perfectly fine up until she does something like wave 'bye bye' to that dumb phoenix."
Upping chances of epic quest/adventure to 70%.
"How old is she?" Kumiko asked. "Does she read romance novels? Fantasy? Shojo manga? Any hobbies?"
Ranma scratched his head. "Actually I was looking for a vaccuum cleaner or something when I came in. She'll be twenty with her birthday. Dunno if she reads anything, haven't seen her do it."
"I see," said Kumiko, "well how about this unit?" A hologram of an apparently sleeping android appeared
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(Posted Tue, 06 May 2003 13:06)
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