Much later:
"You did what?" Neptune asked sweetly of her lover. Despite this not being a timeline with a Takahashi crossover, she felt this strange impulse to pull a mallet out of nowhere and slam it lovingly into her true love's head.
"It's all over the news, even if you weren't at the scene, Sailor Uranus has declared that we should mud wrestle with Kachoo's champions to decide the future of Germany," said Venus in a particularly unhappy mood.
"She did what?" Neptune basically repeated.
"..." sulked Sailor Uranus.
"This is the last camel that broke the straw," declared Venus. "We're now committed to mud wrestling another bunch of women in front of millions of viewers in a round robin elimination!"
"My mother is going to ground me to the point where Chibi-usa is sitting on the throne," bemoaned Sailor Mercury.
"Your mother?" Sailor Jupiter pointed out. "Do you remember what else Uranus said? We'll be lucky if our reputation isn't hopelessly tarnished! Remember how much trouble Venus or I had getting a date? Well, it's going to be fifty times worse!"
Sailor Saturn walked by with a paper bag over her head.
"That bad?!" Neptune asked, prepared to be duly horrified.
"Depends on your definition of bad," said Pluto, acting as if she had the Mother Of All Headaches.
Sailor Uranus winced as she realized the trap. She'd been set up. Kachoo had deferred back to her regarding the sort of sport, asking what kind of sport she'd really like to see her fellow Senshi participate in. She'd shot back 'mud wrestling' in front of millions of viewers. Naturally, the sarcasm had completely shot past the crowd and opponent.
Perky Hinoko Takashima threw out a perfectly innocent, perfectly normal "fluff" question - typical of the Japanese press. "Uranus-san! Uranus-san! What does your boyfriend think of you mudwrestling on international TV? Will this place any strain on your relationship with him?"
Sailor Uranus had been under a lot of strain lately. "Boyfriend?! WHO NEEDS BOYS?! MEN ARE USELESS! Why do you assume we have boyfriends when we could be manhating lesbians!"
The crowd of reporters briefly went so silent you could easily imagine a cricket chirping somewhere nearby.
"I am going to be so grounded," said Sailor Mercury.
"I have Mamo-chan, so I can convince my mother she wasn't talking about me," said Sailor Moon.
"They were so busy talking about the revelation that we're all dedicated to a world of only women that everything else has kind of fallen by the wayside," said Sailor Mercury. "There are a number of American women's groups who have pledged support but by and large our reputation..."
"You can say it, Mercury-chan," said Venus. "Our reputation has not only gone down the toilet, it's backing up the sewer system. Most of the viewing public is going back to earlier mentions of our future utopia and now are casting it as a radical feminist utopia of men being aborted at first sign of anything dangling. In the eyes of the world, we're worse than the alien invader. We've been Schwarzenkinded."
Mercury began to worry as that made perfect sense to her and it had come from Venus.
"So what do we do now?" Sailor Moon asked as she imagined her image being hanged in effigy.
"Well, we could," began Sailor Mercury.
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(Posted Fri, 04 Jul 2003 13:01)
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