Seeing lizardguys with horned heads and crude weapons running towards them, Akane and her two friends got ready to run.
On seeing what the Sleestak were running from, they immediately took to running.
The Pooh characters, a few minor (and as yet undetailed) people from various other continuua, mostly riding dinosaurs, followed.
"RRRAAGGGHHHHHH!" said the tyrannosaurus rex.
Ranma glared up at the chicken.
The chicken glared back.
"Welcome to El Muy Loco Airlines," said a stewardess. "Where if you're flying with us, you must be. Emergency exits are located to the rear of the plane but they don't work anyway so ignore them. There's only three parachutes anyway, and you ain't getting any of them."
Ranma, not for the first time, wondered if anyone would object to him stuffing Nabiki into a small box and mailing her to Where The Sun Don't Shine. Not only had she set him up to go rescue Akane in New York City, she had apparently made travel arrangements that were not only cheap but on a level of insanity normally reserved for the training exercises of Genma Saotome.
Four of the other passengers stood up. "No senorita! We are no going to Hawaii! Thees plane is now ze propertee of ze Reclaimation Of Territories Generally Underhandedly Taken!"
"You're from ROTGUT?" said the stewardess. "The Mexican secret terrorist organization that plans on subverting the legal system and decadent society of the pansy-ass Americans and annexing the territories unfairly stolen from Mexico and restoring them to the proper authorities?"
"You have heard of us?" The unwashed and overweight lead bandito exclaimed. "We are not so secret I am guessing, as I thought we were."
"Hah!" said the stewardess, whipping off her stewardess uniform to reveal something in black leather. "I am secret operative 399 of VODKA!" "No!" The lead Mexican bandit exclaimed, nearly dropping his grenade launcher. "Not the Villainous Organization Dedicated to Kommunizing Amerika!"
"Actually that's just the Hollywood elite, no I speak of VODKA - the Villainous Organization Dedicated to Kaos and Anarchy!" the Stewardess proclaimed as she swung up an assault rifle.
"Uhm, can I bring up the fact that this airplane is mainly held together with chicken wire and duct tape?" Ranma asked reasonably.
"NO!" shouted everyone else on the plane, including the chicken.
Ranma slumped onto his hay bale, which was his seat on this flight. "Great. I'm stuck crossing the Pacific Ocean in a dirigible with forty chickens in rickety cages, a stewardess with some kinda machine gun, Mexican bandits with more firepower than the JSDF, and the pilot's an undead zombie with glowing red pits for eyes. I'm at roughly 10,000 feet altitude over shark infested waters. Did I really offend someone that badly?"
"What are you...?!" The stewardess turned around. "SO! You're actually a double agent working for HELLSING!"
"No, actually, it was the glowing box that we stole from the catacombs under the Vatican," groaned the undead pilot.
"Oh," said Ranma, "great. One of THOSE trips. I was afraid I was going to get bored."
Meanwhile:
Read the comments on this episode
(Posted Thu, 21 Aug 2003 13:20)
Questions? Problems? Suggestions?
Send a mail to addventure@bast-enterprises.de
or use the contact form.
らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
All other series and their characters are © by their respective creators or owners. No claims of ownership of these characters are implied by the authors of this Addventure, or should be inferred.
The Anime Addventure is a non-profit site.