Adventureworld: Lights, Camera, (Pulp) Action [Episode 106563]

by Kestral

It was a somewhat different world. The staples of the "magical girl" series had been discarded, as had the typical Ranmaverse flavoring. Instead the whole thing was more along the line of the old black and white cliffhanger style serials, or of radio dramas that had inspired same, or of the old pulp style of novels with a touch of various other genres stirred in. By and large though, it was a universe of action/adventure.

So superheroes in the manner of Superman were not typical of this world, and there weren't spandex-clad people with spider powers running around.

On the other hand, there were martial artists in tight outfits, two-fisted detectives in trenchcoats, occult investigators in shrine priestess robes, mole men skulking in underground passages while wearing berets and striped shirts (they'd come across a group of unsuspecting mimes and mugged them), and various other sundry groups going about their business. There were even magazines like "Adventurer's Quarterly" and "Archeology Monthly" had sections on how to deal with ancient mechanized traps.

Which is why the Saotome pair had certain rivals and enemies. The profession of adventurer had its own rules. Some were friendly, some were not, and some would gleefully throw at least one of the two into a deathtrap at the first opportunity.

However, adventuring was martial arts training if looked at a certain way. Genma definitely did. What kind of sarariman job could he have worked where one ate breakfast while on a plane heading for a Lost City Of Catmen in South America, had a quick lunch while running from Pygmy Headhunters, and had a late supper of whatever you could catch while riding the rapids in your escape from a Citadel Of Doom? Okay, sometimes the hours resembled the sarariman's sort of thing, and frankly the creaking bones indicated he just was NOT the young and dashing adventurer he once was. Well, younger at least.

Good martial arts training, secret techniques, ancient treasures, and so on. Why, Genma couldn't imagine a better regimen of training that didn't involve lots of money.

Of course, fighting off things like the Horde Of Cannibal Zombie Nazi Stormtroopers had made both Saotome fairly tough and strong. Ranma had never questioned martial arts training, or firearm training, or learning to fly a plane, or a number of other skills (many of these "other" skills Genma himself didn't know) because you never knew what skill was going to save your life at any given point.

Which brought in the presence of Minako Aino. Like Ranma, she was good at a few things, specialized in a single area, and terrible at other things. Oddly, one of the things she was extremely good at was as a combat pilot. She handled g-forces exceptionally well and had a "knack" for being able to get the most out of whatever she was piloting at the time. She was, however, as bad a driver as she was good a pilot.

Akane knew these three therefore, as she read "Adventurer's Monthly" and had shown the article to her two sisters after Genma Saotome had arrived.

Name: Genma Saotome
Classification: Martial Artist/Sensei
Base: Mobile (Orient)
Specialization: Martial Arts/Orient
Adventurer Rating: D
D Rating: Known petty thief. Was once described as having all the finesse of a rutting warthog.
Known Ratings: Excellent sneakthief, highly ranked martial artist, highly skilled shuffleboard player
Name: Ranma Saotome
Classification: Martial Artist/Marksman
Base: Mobile (Orient)
Specialization: Physical Combat
Adventurer Rating: D+
D+ Rating: Too much association with his father, but excellent adaptability to combat situations. Promising.
Known Ratings: High strength, speed, and martial arts skills. Believed by some to be almost as good as Reiji Inoue.
Name: Minako Aino
Classification: Girl Friday/Pilot
Base: Mobile (Orient)
Specialization: Treasure Hunting
Adventurer Rating: D
D Rating: Excellent combat and bush pilot, fair martial artist, but is amazing inept at a number of activities.
Known Ratings: Excellent natural pilot, fair martial artist.
"In the same class as Reiji Inoue?" remarked Akane as Ranma cheerfully tried to beat the heck out of his father. "I don't see it."

Dead silence.

Both the tubby man and the pigtailed youth had stopped in mid-blow. Ranma's look towards Akane was cold and completly without any humor. "What was that?"

Akane frowned. "Reiji Inoue? He's rated national level. He's one of the best."

"Excuse me?" said Ranma.

"Now boy, I know your rivalry with that poseur," began Genma, hoping to head off hostilities. It didn't help that Genma remembered starting the feud between the two - knowing that Ranma needed a rival to try and outdo. It hadn't been apparent to Genma at the time exactly WHAT the celebrated Reiji Inoue was.

"Excuse me?" repeated Ranma to Akane.

"He's a hero," said Akane. She read stories about Inoue all the time, and how he used his martial arts prowess to win contests and smash evil organizations and champion noble causes.

"Excuse me?" repeated Ranma, twitching a little.

Minako sniffed. "Uhm, I've met Inoue. Slick and cute, but anyone who considers putting sugar in your opponent's gas tanks to be a valid martial arts manuever for winning a race needs a good butt-whupping."

"Lies spread by poor losers," quoted Akane from one of Reiji's interviews. Reiji Inoue was so tall and dashing and the epitome of being a martial artist adventuring hero - of course he was bound to make people jealous.

Ranma glanced at Akane again and shrugged, dismissing her as yet another know-nothing. Someone ELSE who'd bought into the press surrounding that twerp.

"Be that as it may," said Soun, "we need to get back to something of importance."

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(Posted Sat, 26 Jun 2004 09:01)


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