Ah, yes. Then, eventually, he'd just steal Ranma back. It wasn't like he hadn't done it before. There had been whatshisname and that okonomiyaki cart. He doubted anyone remembered that. All water under the bridge.
A little girl stood straight, the fires of determination glowing in her eyes. "I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE!"
"Oh, there goes Ukyo again!" said one of the other little girls.
"She is SO unfeminine," complained another.
"That's why her fiance left her," said another little girl with absolutely no evidence but complete conviction.
"Sooooo," said all of them.
Ukyo stared. Could that have been it? Well, she'd beat the snot out of them and then prove she could out-feminine anyone! If she could figure out what 'feminine' was supposed to be...
"So, Ami, you're a 'Nerdette' - what does that mean exactly?" asked the reporter.
Ami adjusted her glasses before replying, irritation displacing her usual shy. "I assume you've seen my intelligence scores on those tests?"
"Yes, we have. Very impressive for your age," said the reporter.
"According to the scale you use, I have an IQ of over 200," said Ami. "I also have the ability of telemechanics. I can operate, repair, upgrade, and 'tweak' systems by reaching into the machine with my mind."
"I see," said the interviewer, seemingly discomfited by the directness of the little girl.
"The last three interviewers then went on to ask me silly questions about trivial matters," said Ami. "I do hope you're not going to waste everyone's time like that repeating inane questions involving 'duckies' or something like that."
"Uhm, no," said the interviewer, crossing off the next four questions.
"They then seemed inordinately amused by my declaration that I am going to be one of Ranma's brides," said Ami, coming to the real reason for her irritability. "It is not my own lack of understanding, it is your own. While I am a Very Near Human pokegirl with minimal physical deviation from strictly human parameters - I am still a pokegirl. We have bonded with Ranma. Our souls resonate now. If we are seperated from him we will find him. When our bodies have developed sufficient maturity, we will be his brides. Your laws as regards polygamy are not applicable in this instance as biological factors take precedence over socio-cultural issues."
"Ah, right," said the interviewer. "So you're saying eventually you'll 'marry' Ranma and have children who will be pokegirls?"
"Most will," said a now blushing and fidgeting Ami. "Human children are possible. I can hope. I'll be a doctor and I can help my pokegirl sisters when they're pregnant."
"You're only eight years old and you're planning children?" asked the interviewer.
"All of us are planning our careers," said Ami. "By the way, what is it with your education system? I have seen little in the way of career planning or aptitude testing, and I would expect guidance counselors with more indication of the career tracks available. Have you considered putting together a database that can cross-correlate?"
The shadows appeared over the meeting place. The two agents of a foreign government looked up, got an inkling of what was about to happen, and fled. They kept their legal contract and would take the boy and girls later. For now, self-preservation instincts were counseling a retreat.
Genma slowly put down the drink he'd been about to toss back. Danger senses honed under the Master's training were indicating that something nasty was about to happen.
"Genma Saotome?" asked one very large individual wearing almost entirely black clothing.
"Nope. Notsh here. Think he go thataway," said Genma, pointing helpfully.
"Genma Saotome, you have admitted on national television that you were trying to summon a demon in order to train your son. Is this the scroll you were using?"
Genma glanced at the writing. "Hey! Thash mine! It didn't work sho well though."
"Let the record show that Genma Saotome recognized and claimed ownership of a copy of the Scroll Of Nine Gates," said the guy who was bigger than many pro "American Football" players to his fellows. "He was probably saved by it being a third generation copy and the water damage to passage number three."
"You some kinda cop?" asked Genma. "Gimmee my scroll back."
"Actually," said the man whose clothing was black except for the white collar, "I'm with the Vatican."
"I'm a Rabbi," said the second huge man, cracking knuckles.
"I'm a Mulah," said the third man, frowning severely.
"I'm a Shaolin priest," said the fourth man, looking almost serene in comparison.
"You stand accussed of violating the common precepts of faith," said the Vatican representitive. "One, you have endangered the human species through flagrant stupidity and attempting to consort with beings of the lowest planes."
"Huh?" said Genma.
"Summoning Class V Demonic Beings," explained the Shaolin.
"Oh? Sho what? Free country," complained Genma.
"Two," continued the figure from the Vatican. "If you had actually succeeded - you would have doomed yourself at the very least. Possibly the world as a whole, causing Armaggedon."
"Not that such is a commonly held belief," said the Shaolin, "yet there would be much suffering if such a thing were made a reality - that is unacceptable."
"Shuffering?" muttered Genma. "Shuffering is for the sake of the Art. Can't progress in Art without suffering."
"Ah," said the Vatican rep. "Let us progress you in your Art then."
"Whoa," said a watching government type.
"I can't look. There's just something so wrong about a bunch of priests beating the royal snot out of... Actually it's kind of amusing isn't it?"
"What kind of special manuever is 'Pacifist Piledriver'?" asked another government agent.
"Wow, it looks like Genma's fighting back! He's pretty good," said another.
"Yeah, but that Rabbi has a 'multi-strike' manuever. Oh, that's got to hurt."
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(Posted Sat, 15 Oct 2005 09:52)
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らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
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