He only had one chance at this.
"You have to stop him!" called out that one woman. "If he uses that, it could be the End Of The World."
"I've been looking for this for three hundred years!" declared Happosai, fitting the pieces together. "Fabulous! Simply Fabulous!"
"Where's Ranma?" asked Yuka.
"Akane put him into orbit earlier today, he hasn't been seen since then," answered Ukyo. "That's when he crashed into your UFO, huh sugar?"
"Yes, unfortunately I haven't had a chance to get him out of the hyperspace fold," said the woman, whose ears went flat. "You've got to stop him though. That's an ancient device from Sigma Draconus, the civilization that built it wiped themselves out in a single instant!"
"How do we know you're a real alien?" asked Hiroshi.
"Sugar, she's green, she's got elf-ears, and she rides a UFO, where do you think she's from - Roppongi Hills?" asked Ukyo.
"Yeah, she could be," answered Hiroshi.
"So what does the device do?" asked Ukyo. "And how does he know how to put it together?"
"Nobody knows," said the alien girl. "I was transporting it to Central when I stopped here to resupply. Best guess is that it actualizes desire by superstring manipulation."
"Can ya try that in layman's terms?" asked Ukyo.
"You think about what you want and it makes it happen," said the alien.
Happosai snickered. The device wanted to be used. Yes, he could tell it wanted to be used. To fulfill desires. And he had some pretty big desires! It was telling him HOW to put it together. Then it would tap into available energy and give him exactly what he wanted.
"OKAY!" said Happosai holding the completed device up. He focussed his will, his drive, his energy into a single thought. "Whoa. I saw that Urusei Yatsura on TV, so I know exactly what I want. Hee hee. I WANT A WORLD OF LUSCIOUS BEAUTIFUL BODACIOUS GIRLS! YOUNG SUCCULENT CURVACEOUS BEAUTIES! A LOT LESS GUYS TOO! That way there's more for me! Scantily clad and exotic and... wait. No no. NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!"
ZAP!
"It used his lifeforce to spark it, converting his mass to energy to fuel the process," said the alien girl.
"Should we run?" asked Hiroshi, strangely calm.
"If you think it would help," said the alien scientist. "You've got five seconds. three. two one."
FLASH!
"Where'd all the guys go?" asked Yuka, looking around.
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(Posted Tue, 22 Aug 2006 17:37)
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