“I still can’t believe you’re working for a diabolical conspiracy to take over the world,” Ami accused as they stepped out of the elevator.
“I keep telling you, it’s a typical international corporation that operates legally and above board,” Umino quoted his briefing. And if he’d known it would surround him with the cutest girls in school, and two cuties not even from his school, he’d have joined one earlier.
“Their mission statement specifically mentions world domination,” Makoto countered, flipping through the document he’d given her to browse.
“Your job title is also listed as Dark Major (Technical Division),” Usagi pointed to the building directory. “And the company is even called, ‘Evil Overlord Incorporated’!”
“Plus, I’m sure they’re involved in heinous activities, dangerous plots, and highly suspicious merchandise,” Rei argued with an ominous twitch of her eyebrow and held up a printout. “I caught Grandfather ordering one of their ‘Rei Doll’ things off of sleezeBay. Look!”
Thank you for your purchase of the REI Doll. We hope you enjoy your anatomically correct replicant.
Instructions:
“There’s nothing suspicious about selling, er, adult toys. Evil Overlord Incorporated is a typical international corporation that operates openly and above board,” Umino repeated his ridiculous assertion.
“I think you’d be better off with a diabolical conspiracy,” Minako observed.
“…” everybody mouthed while elevator muzak played in the background.
“Ah, could ya’all run that by me again?” Naru’s question broke the sudden silence.
“I’ve signed a contract with an international corporation before,” Minako boasted and silently added, ‘and fought a nefarious crime syndicate too.’ Aloud, she added darkly, “trust me, I know which I’d prefer to deal with.”
“Interesting, I believe we bought that contract out,” interrupted Rei; but not their Rei. “You should receive notification from your manager soon, Miss Aino.”
As one, they turned on speaker who turned out to be a girl their age; one whose pale skin contrasted markedly with the dark buiness suit. The eyes behind the horn rimmed glasses had a distinctively reddish cast; and in the office light you could even say they glowed. Finally, a pair of bone-white, feathery wings framed her silloette.
“You did what now?“ Minako demanded of the apparition.
“I said we signed a lucrative contract with your manager, Miss Aino.” the angel of death repeated. “When we found out that Dark Major Gurio was a fan of yours, it was decided to secure the use of your image for promotions as a surprise bonus.”
“Oh, that’s just plummy,” Minako commented dryly, and cast a dark look the boy’s way. “Being sponsored by an evil organisation™, just what I always wanted.”
“You’re welcome, I’m sure,” the angel said without a trace of irony. “We didn’t realise he was already a friend of yours, but that shouldn’t present a problem.” She decided to consult with her clones on whether they should continue with the scheduled personal loyalty induction process or just stick with the standard employee package. Though it probably couldn’t hurt. Shrugging, she turned to Umino and saluted.
“Angel of Death, Rei™ #7 reporting for duty, Major Gurio. I shall be your liason with the Overlord while we set up offices here and at the Tower. Would you like to meet technician crew seven now?”
“Uh, sure,” Umino nodded. “Uh, what about the girls?”
Rei#7 considered them carefully. “Oh, they shouldn’t be a problem. We won’t be discussing any restricted projects today. Just familiarising yourself with your technical crew, and the the giant robots, the urban assult tanks, ninja team, and the kaju, you’ll be responsible for. That sort of thing. Routine stuff, really, and it’s not likely that your friends are spys for some secret resistance organisation this early in the game, after all. We’ll leave the classified secret weapons till later.”
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(Posted Wed, 14 Feb 2007 03:28)
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らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
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