That the mood in the Nekohanten was tense came as no surprise. Cologne had expected some initial hostility as Ranma and his suitors gathered in a back room of the establishment (wouldn’t want the customers to hear this conversation, after all). However, she’d also expected that the majority of the hostility would be directed at her, due to her rather abrupt use of the Xi Fa Xiang Gao on Shampoo; thus, the conversation amongst the teenagers took her off guard.
“I still can’t believe you’d do something like that,” said Akane in a huff.
“An’ I can’t believe yer makin’ such a big deal outta this!” her fiancé retorted. Admittedly, this was not very surprising in and of itself — it seemed that each new day brought with it new excuses for Ranma and Akane to get into various arguments. It was the next statement, however, that revealed the subject of this particular argument to have much more gravity than the pair’s usual squabbles.
“You cheated, Ranma!” Ukyo said, laying aside her customary pet name for the pigtailed artist in order to more accurately convey her frustration and disappointment.
“How was it cheatin’?”
“It’s cheating because you didn’t come up with the answer yourself; you just got it from me and Ukyo!”
“Hey, Tanaka-sensei just asked if I knew how many ships were in Perry’s fleet — an thanks ta you two, I did know the answer, so I gave it ta him. He never asked if I’d actually taken the time ta learn it.”
“That’s because he has no reason to think that you’d have any other way of knowing it,” Ukyo responded. “You’re completely destroying the whole point of education…. Yes, Ranma, there is a point to it, and you know it.”
“Ugh,” Ranma grunted, eager to wrap up this train wreck of a conversation. “Fine, I’ll grant ya that that ain’t the kinda thing I oughta be doin’ ta get better grades — but this wasn’t for a quiz or test or nuthin’ like that. He was just askin’ ta see whether or not I was payin’ attention, that’s all.”
“You weren’t paying attention!” Akane roared.
Kodachi, in a somewhat ill-advised move, took this opportunity to enter the fray and defend her Ranma-sama. “Well, if I may say something—”
“You stay out of this, you wacko,” Ukyo said with a glare.
“I hardly think that feasible; after all, are any of us even capable of ‘staying out’ of the affairs of the mind where Ranma is concerned?”
“Fine. What lunacy do you have to add to this?”
“Only that it makes sense for Ranma to use any factual data he collects from you. After all, the five of us now have a common knowledge base through these links, do we not?”
“Can Airen please try to understand Flower Girl? Shampoo confused enough as it is.”
“I’ll give it my best shot, but I ain’t makin’ no promises.” Ranma was clearly uncomfortable that Kodachi was defending his point of view; this was, in and of itself, enough to make him rethink his position.
Kodachi squinted out a glare of her own at these oblique (if unintentional) insults of her character. “I’m only saying that it’s absurd to expect him to deliberately answer questions wrong simply because you know the correct answers. He should be allowed to take advantage of whatever advantages he can — besides, is this not one of the basic precepts of his Art?”
“Well… yes… that is somewhat in line with the philosophy of Anything Goes,” Akane admitted. “But you can’t just ignore the rules.”
“I didn’t ignore the rules,” Ranma said. “I just bent them a little.”
“And if it had been a graded quiz?”
“I dunno… I’d have figured somethin’ out.”
“In any case,” Cologne said, “your ethical conundrum will have to wait until later. You are here to discuss some of the finer points of Amazon law, after all.”
| Finally, some answers. Maybe she’ll be able to explain this better than Ranchan could. | Oh, yeah. We still gotta go over that stuff. I oughta smack that old crone for this. | Might as well get this over with. I bet it’s going to be something really stupid. | Note to self: Look up “conundrum” in Japanese dictionary. | Joy of joys… I get to learn about the outdated customs of a backwards society. Why do I get the feeling that I’ll have another migraine before this is over? |
| It has to be stupid. The Amazons don’t bring the death penalty into anything unless it’s monumentally stupid. | It’s not that bad, Airen. Really, I would much rather have some of my mind closed off from me than deal with the problems that allowing its contents to escape would cause. | Then again, perhaps a migraine would be more appealing than listening to this drivel. | Wait a minute… Ranchan? Why am I calling him Ranchan? I’m still angry at him! | What the…? Oh, great, I’m havin’ another one of those episodes where I can’t decide who ta pay attention to. I wonder how long I’ll last this time before Cologne has ta knock me out again. |
| Though, I must admit, they can be somewhat pleasing at times, in a droning, slightly masochistic sense. | Look, just remember that you’re not off the hook yet, Rancha— Ranma. | “Masochistic”? Man, I hope Kodachi ain’t tryin’ ta bring sex inta things again. |
I mean, just once, I’d like to hear about an Amazon custom that actually makes sense. Just once, that’s all. | I suggest you focus on Great-grandmother, Airen. I assure you, her explanation will be of a much better quality than my own feeble attempts. |
Somehow, Cologne had a feeling that the five teenagers would need some time to switch their attention to the task at hand, so she waited a few seconds before continuing. “As you all likely know by now, this morning, I used the Xi Fa Xiang Gao technique to block some of my great-granddaughters memories in an effort to keep them from escaping unintentionally. This information is highly sensitive, and to allow outsiders to learn of them is strictly forbidden, and to be prevented at all costs.”
“Yeah, yeah, we know,” Ranma said. “Yer gonna hafta send the death squads after us.”
“Actually, you would likely receive the same punishment as Shampoo, as you are already an Amazon according to our law — but I digress,” Cologne hastily added to keep the conversation from veering into the dangerous territory of Ranma’s marital status. “I want to assure you that Shampoo has not forgotten anything which will change her personality in any way.”
“Just what did you erase, anyway?” Akane asked.
“Were you even listening to what I said?” Cologne asked with a raised eyebrow.
“I didn’t mean that. I’m asking what kinds of information was erased. Surely you can tell us that.”
“I could, but I don’t think it wise. You see, I don’t want to do anything that would speed up the return of Shampoo’s memories until a permanent solution is reached.”
“Huh? Whaddya mean by that?” Ranma asked.
“It’s quite simple: the effects of the Xi Fa Xiang Gao aren’t permanent. Remember, the memories aren’t erased, they are merely blocked; over time, those blocks deteriorate. Furthermore, all Amazons go through training that allows their subconscious to speed up that deterioration considerably — this is done to drastically reduce its effectiveness should our enemies try to use it against us.”
“But couldn’t someone just block the training?” Ukyo asked.
“No. Remember, the training is subconscious; and the technique only affects the conscious mind. In any case, if I mention the specific bits of information, her subconscious, her subconscious can use that to accelerate the deterioration.”
“Indeed,” replied Kodachi. “And just how long will these blocks last without any hints.”
“It’s hard to tell,” the Matriarch replied. “It depends on the mental resiliency of the victim. But in Shampoo’s case, I’d say you have two, maybe three weeks before the Xi Fa Xiang Gao wears off, assuming that she takes what precautions she can to delay the breakdown.”
“Shampoo will do so.”
“As I knew you would,” Cologne told her progeny.
“So, what, we got two weeks ta think of a solution?”
“No,” the wizened Amazon corrected. “You have two weeks to implement a solution, which means you’ll have to decide on one relatively soon. Now, I have thought of several possible solutions….”
“Well, what’re ya waitin’ for? Let’s hear ’em!”
“Before I begin, I must warn you that the chances of any of you will like any of the possibilities I am about to suggest are extremely slim.”
“Will you quit stalling and just tell us?” asked Ukyo with no small amount of irritation.
“Very well,” replied Cologne.
And thus, she informed them of their options:
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(Posted Tue, 27 Mar 2007 05:16)
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