As such, he knew that he couldn't wait if he was to get the duty that had come upon him done properly. "So, we must go fully into this task, so that the goddess of beauty that is Akane Tendo can be properly cared for, as is her right and privilege!"
"What are you talking about, upperclassman?" Yuka asked, though she was clearly disinterested in the answer.
"And it's 'Akane Saotome' now...." Sayuri muttered under her breath.
Not that the would be samurai paid much mind to either girl as he whipped his bokuto around to point it at the newest student in the school. "Know this, our lessons begin this day. Upon this very moment!"
"Eh?" Ranma scoffed, snorting slightly at the point of the wooden weapon. "What am I supposedta learn from someone like ya?"
"Ah, spoken like the ignorant fool that you no doubt are. Well, that is why it falls to me, of a higher station and class than yourself to introduce you to the manners of a proper man. But at least you know enough to ask the proper question."
"Ya gotta be kidding me."
"I assure you that I am being most serious, as this is a matter of grave importance. No worries though, for I shall help you greatly. We can begin with you appearance."
"And what's wrong with that?" the pigtailed boy growled.
"You must be joking. For someone to come out with such low class clothing even to this edifice of learning on normal matters is insulting. No, for someone who is to be the companion of the fair maiden that is Akane, only the most formally set of school clothing will be acceptable."
None of those there bothered to mention that Kuno himself was not dressed in a school uniform at the moment either... mainly because they already knew that he'd just ignore that comparison anyway.
"So you shall simply have to dress according to what she truly deserves."
Ranma glared at the elder boy. "Why don'tcha fix yourself first, huh?"
"Eh? Why should I? Am I not perfect as I am? For the heavens already grace my person with their blessing, and see my glorious self for the blessing to humanity that it is. And I do not need to improve my being as I am already an idol to women everywhere, and now that the fierce Akane's hand is no longer within my reach...."
"Yeah?"
"They can now flock to my side, attempting to show their worth to become the one to become mine! Certainly they shall come to soothe my injured heart, with the hope that the balm that they will apply will open my love to them. Even here we can find some likely candidates!" Kuno declared, looking rather pleased at the prospect.
Sayuri and Yuka just grimaced and cringed as they saw the 'Blue Thunder' glance in their direction.
"I am certain that they would like to make reparations for the believed slight that their friend might have given me by joining with another man, even if her choice can not be in the wrong. They would clearly want to do all that they can...."
"Upperclassman...." Akane murmured as she got to her feet.
"Yes, oh fair and beloved maiden. Have you come to declare your apologies for having to leave my side, or do you wish to make your requests now as to the treatment of your companions...."
"SHUT UP AND DIE!" the married girl yelled as she belted him in the side of the head so hard that his body below the neck seemed to fly up under her arm.
Getting up, Ranma moved to the elder boy... and kicked him so that the kendo practitioner wound up flipping backwards as he crashed to the ground.
His wife then literally kicked Kuno's ass, and snapped the bokuto with a squeeze of one hand.
A series of punches came Kuno's way, but Ranma's fists moved so quickly that most students couldn't tell where they were.
And Akane did well in stomping on her self imposed 'paramour', crushing him into the ground with every thump of her small foot.
'Ah, but they must be quite bothered by the concept of my attention going away from Akane's needs,' Kuno thought to himself as he lost consciousness.
The thrashing continued though, and probably would have gone on even if they had known that he'd been knocked out. Not that any of the other students were making any movements to defend someone who, at the end of the day, was a fellow classmate. Instead, they merely watched, some even with bored expressions, until something that really got them concerned drew their attention.
A certain series of chimes familiar to many a member, former and current, of the education system echoed through the area.
"Oh man," Sayuri sighed as she saw a number of students leaving the area. "It's time to go."
"That's right. Lunch period is over," Yuka observed.
Glancing over at their friends, the married couple took note of the comment and recognized what that meant for them.
"Time to go in, Ranma," Akane commented, stepping lightly over to their lunches.
Her husband rubbed a hand on the back of his head and sighed. "Damn it, and I wanted ta enjoy this time more."
"Really?"
"Well... yeah. After this, it's just back ta class 'til the end of the day."
"Ugh. Ranma...."
"What?"
"Come on, lover boy. We have lessons to catch," Sayuri chided, smiling a bit helplessly as she pushed him gently towards the school building, with his wife coming to his side, and Yuka shaking her head as she joined up with her friends.
Nobody particularly paid much mind to the lump in the hakama that was currently battered, bruised, and laying on the ground near where they had been having lunch. Actually, none of the students paid him much mind at all, and he was just left to stay there as he was. All noise in the yard slowly trickled away until nothing was left, save for the sound of a breeze stirring the air.
That was about when a small bird landed on Kuno's head and began chirping slightly, while:
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(Posted Wed, 05 Nov 2008 02:54)
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らんま1/2 © Rumiko Takahashi
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