Akane giggled sheepishly as she was bouncing on the bed. At last! Now that Nabiki was out of the room, she had a chance to read that truly female-empowering Manga: “Gold Digger”!
Sure, it was made by some gaijin—a chocolate person if she wasn’t mistaken--but damn it; all the main characters were strong, out-spoken women, the men skilled and while useful were VERY subservient to them, and there was money to be made through skill and adventure! And hell, there was even a girl that Akane absolutely loved—she Kapowied all perverts upon seeing them!
The youngest Tendo’s giggle grew a bit louder as she turned the pages. While in deep, repressive denial about it … the fact was Akane rather enjoyed the rather ‘generous assets’ of the women in said manga too…
“Hmm,” she thought, looking at apparent two new characters—though likely to be only seen for a few issues and then left to rot in whatever place characters like that ended up.
In the multiverse, several lemon fanfic writers sneezed … per city, per country, per planet, per universe…
Pausing a bit, she turned the comic several ways, taking in the characters—who would soon be very glad that Akane’s actions with said comic would have no effect upon their new universe. “Hey,” she murmured, “they almost look like they’re—”
“FUCKING KAMI-DAMN IT!” Ranma yelled out as they fully formed in the new reality. He was panting heavily as he came to grips with what had just occurred; the two caught up within the D’Jinni Magic that answered the wish. The area that surrounded both Nabiki and him seemed be in a state of total flux, fading one moment, blurring the next, colors swirling as the people around them were frozen in place, time at a standstill all around them, except for the two in the center of this reality they had landed in.
“… You SO owe me a wish…” Ranma griped to the Middle Tendo daughter. Damn it! He already dealt with this crap on a weekly basis! This was the third hair-raising annoyance this month alone…
And it was only Wednesday!
“Shut up!” Nabiki hissed, also angry—but more at herself. A wish. A genuine wish … and she wasted it on SUCH a trivial comment!
“Welcome!” Mihoshi called out from beside them, scaring both enough that they almost jumped out of the pocket of flux-reality. “As per your wish, you are now in the reality of—”
“I DIDN’T MAKE A WISH!” Ranma yelled out.
“… But,” whimpered Mihoshi, “didn’t you give it to her?” the blond Djinn asked.
“NO!” Ranma yelled, too angry to care that tears were forming in Mihoshi’s eyes—but if he calmed enough, he’d be blabbering to comfort her, have no doubt. “I simply asked her advice!”
“… Oh!” Mihoshi offered.
“Wait!” Nabiki snarled. “Where are we and...” she looked over herself, frowning as who the heck would wear this get-up with high-heels. “WHY am I wearing a lab-coat and …” she trailed off and opened it, horrified to see she was wearing a lingerie get-up of black corset, panties, garter-belt with straps connected to sheer stockings beneath it and nothing else. She quickly snapped her lab-coat shut, blushing so deep crimson from how flustered she was that she barely noticed as her glasses slanted on her nose.
Ranma’s nose dripped with a little red—only a little as his regenerative abilities kicked in, cutting off the nose-bleed before it had a chance to really start. “Um … interesting choice of outfit, Nabiki.”
Hearing that, the Middle Tendo turned to glare at him; an expression that soon became wide-eyed shock. Without another word she turned to look at the buxom blonde that had brought them here. “Gold Digger.”
It wasn’t a question.
Ranma was about to comment about why Nabiki was calling herself names, when Mihoshi popped away. “… O~kay,” Ranma muttered, scratching his head. “Shouldn’t she have been here longer to explain—why do I feel furry?” he asked himself.
Then he looked down.
Nabiki soon wished her outfit had enough spare cloth to rip off and plug her ears as Ranma screamed.
Gina blinked her eyes as she heard screaming outside of her Office. She’d actually sat in at the Explorer’s Society today due to a scheduled appointment with Professor Nabiki Tendo … or as she was better known in Japan, “Dr. Gedo”.
Yes; like Gina herself, Nabiki had earned herself a nickname, in this case, “Evil”. She didn’t blame it on the woman, considering how the Japanese were a very patriarchal society and held a glass ceiling very low over the head of their women. It was obvious when someone with Nabiki was born with an IQ of 209—now 311 if her info was correct—that they’d be more than a little nervous about her shaking up their previous little bubble of honor and tradition.
Still, as she heard the screaming … perhaps there WAS some truth to the rumors about the woman’s … “kinks”.
Shaking her head, Gina started to hum, pretending she heard nothing, and reciting her own motto for those meetings: “I see NOTHING! I hear NOTHING!”
Getting tired of trying to prevent her ears from bleeding—as well as other damage Ranma’s screams might create, as well as panicked movements—Nabiki did what she was taught by her Older Sister to do … to their Father when he was in similar states.
She PIMP-slapped Ranma, otherwise known as medicinal backhanding.
*SMACK*!
Miraculously, the pigtailed martial artist DID stop. He blinked his eyes once, twice, thrice. “… Nabiki…?” he whispered slowly.
Nodding her head, the woman reflexively--a reflex she didn’t know she had before this--pushed her glasses back up into place on the bridge of her nose. “Yes, Ranma?”
“… You owe me a wish.”
*SMACK*!
Well, Kasumi always said daddy needed to take, ‘two of these and then call her in the morning’…
“What the fuck was that for!?” Ranma demanded.
“You were being troublesome,” Nabiki replied. “Plus you demanded a refund.”
“I still do!” Ranma protested.
*SMACK x4!
Nabiki nodded at his stunned appearance, though she did wonder why she heard the voice from Killer Instinct proclaiming Super Combo.
“… SO awesome!” Akane giggled as she continued to read on, turning the page. She hoped these characters caught on like Ayane “The Mistress” Anno did.
Nabiki blinked her eyes once, twice. Oh wait. Never mind. If this was the US Manga “Gold Digger”, such would be part of the author’s sense of humor. “Ranma...” she hissed at him. “Do you realize what happened?”
“… Yeah,” Ranma said in all seriousness. “You wasted MY wish, bringing us here to … well…” he looked around, blinking as he took in their surroundings. Kind of reminded him of one of those places his father took him on training missions to pilfer some goodies for the pawn shop and drinking money. “I think we’re in a Must-See-’Em or something.”
“…” Nabiki turned to look around... and winced when she saw the door that had the gold letter heading of, [Dr. Gina B. Diggers: President of the Explorer’s Society]. “We’re in the Decatur area of Atlanta, Georgia.”
“…” Ranma just blinked his eyes once, twice. “And?”
“United States,” Nabiki stated firmly.
“… Does this mean we won’t have to worry about Gojira?”
*SMACK*!
“Ow!” Ranma muttered, glaring at the shorter-than-he-realized Tendo. “What was that for!?”
“Asking a stupid question,” Nabiki replied, looking about as their ‘bubble’ expanded, allowing her to see more definition to this world she had ended up in.
Drat! No safe yet!
… She was still Nabiki Tendo … for now.
“But the teachers at Furinkan said there was never a stupid question…”
*SMACK x7! “That’s for believing a teacher,” she replied, ignoring the echo of Master Combo! in her head.
Ranma whimpered. She … she had a really strong backhand. Granted, the pain would go away very quickly but those smacks STILL hurt when they happened. “Why you gotta keep hitting—NOT IN THE FACE! NOT IN THE FACE!” the pigtailed martial artist cried as he lifted his arms to protect himself.
Sighing, the woman finally released him. “Ranma… Let’s get something straight. We’re in a manga that takes place in the United States: Gold Digger.”
“… So?” Ranma said slowly. “Is it your autobiography or some--”
SMACKx28!!!* ULTRA! ULTRA! ULTRA! ULTRA! seemed to be the repeating chant as Ranma’s face finally seemed to stay bruised for more than a solid minute.
“… Owie,” the man whimpered, wondering why he was putting up with this.
“Ranma! Listen and listen well!!!” Nabiki hissed. “This is a world of BOTH High Fantasy and Super Science Fiction! You’re just as likely to come across a Battalion of Elves as you are an Armada of Aliens! You have to take this seriously!”
“But you just said it’s fantasy…”
“Yeah, but unlike A LOT of writers, this Manga PLAYS FOR KEEPS!”
“So … a mind-fuck ending?” he asked, remembering Evangelion in all its forms.
Nabiki raised her backhand—as instructed by her tennis coach who she sent to a penniless grave—before lowering it. “… Yeah, probably,” she replied. “This comic combines elements from a lot of genres.”
“… Who wrote it?” Ranma asked. Oh, how he hoped it wasn’t the same writer as Sailor Moon. He couldn’t survive the plotholes … or the cute loli from the future.
Loli lead to the Dark Side … of the prison.
Nabiki shrugged. “Hell if I know, some Vet from the wars in Iraq.”
“Rack what?” Ranma asked.
… She backhanded him on general principle.
It was then as she smacked him that the ‘bubble’ the two were in popped. It was amazing how … well … it was almost a relief. In being fused with this reality in full, there were memories now, experiences, new skills…
Which had a few moments of clashing as their original minds were NOT lost; but now they had a new background that they could remember the details to. Yes, Professor Nabiki “Gedo” Tendo: smartest woman in the world, and one of Dr. Gina Diggers “friendly rivals”. Whereas Laura Craft was the one who would upstage Gina in adventuring, Nabiki was the one who one-upped the blonde in out-and-out intelligence.
Why, such intelligence--IQ of 324 thank you very much—was why at the ripe old age of two, she’d made Ranma out of the tiniest smidge of werecheetah DNA she found on her mother’s coat she got from the Salvation Army—as Soun Tendo could never afford anything from an upscale store—and a test-tube/container from an E-Z-Bake oven.
This was apparently something Ranma remembered now as well. “So … I don’t have to worry about a glass beaker demanding I commit seppuku, right?” he asked, just to make sure.
Nabiki just glared at him. “You are now … a catboy.”
“… WAAAA~AAAAAAH—oh, wait,” Ranma muttered, as his memories finally settled.
No fiancées…
No Neko-ken!
No Furinkan!
… Did he mention the fiancées? Did he mention that extended to fiancés? He had no outstanding commitments, nobody demanding his hand in marriage for promises made by a greedy panda!
Nothing could ruin this moment of euphoria for him! NOTHING!
*SPLASH!*
… Did he mention Nabiki was a bitch, a big ole bitch, the biggest bitch in the whole wide world? “Did you HAVE to do that?” Ranma-chan sputtered.
Yes, CHAN! Yep. Apparently, they’d come across one of the rare “Enigmas” while on an expedition and now Ranma’s genetic structure was in-flux. He would become a SHE still whenever cold water came into play and back with warm.
“No. No I didn’t…” Nabiki clarified for Ranma as she considered her position. Okay, so Ranma was her home-grown assistant—‘Chia Minion’ was the term she remembered—while she herself … was…
Oh … oh dear.
Nabiki trembled. Yeah, that would explain how she was dressed. Apparently the lab-coat only came on when she made public appearances … and she wore even LESS in private. Somehow, growing up in a male dominated society left her as one of those women that reveled in their femininity, hence the lingerie as her preferred clothing.
More little droplets of blood came down Ranma-chan’s nose. Yep, the neo-woman werecheetah had such memories of her in such states of indecency too.
And ironically, THAT was part of what brought her to Atlanta. She’d been ruffling a lot of feathers back in Japan and the Diet had been moving against her, creating various laws and Regulations which would limit her own scientific growth...
… And how much money she had. Money! OH SWEET KAMI-SAMA! The inventions! The patents … she … SHE WAS RICH!!!
Ranma-chan gasped as she dropped to the floor, the Tendo woman dancing a merry little jig, despite how she was dressed.
Apparently, like many other masters with minions, she had taken certain, shall we say, liberties, with her chia-assistant.
Tilting her head to the side, she had to admit, not bad on her front. Only one pregnancy scare—minus her other self’s disappointment for the loss of experimental material to play with—had come from it so far. However, on the bright side, she also invented a Pill that was one hundred percent effective preventing it.
She might even market it in a few years, if she could determine if it would keep religious nuts from ringing her doorbell, asking what God or Gods she had heard about.
Her Nerima-self hated the fact she had apparently broken Saotome’s cherry.
Her new-self was glad she could sell him and say he was experienced. How many males for sell could be claimed to know what a clit was? How many would claim it existed? Had found it? Had been able to properly ‘motivate’ it?
Looking down at the perverse-comatose female, she had to admit, she had been forced into a pretty good gig. Yep! Nothing could ruin this!
*POP!*
“WAAA~AAAAH!” cried a furry Mihoshi … in a similar shade as to Ranma. “I GOT SUSPENDED!”
“… Wo~ow, never been fucked for challenging Fate like that,” Nabiki mused. Who knew Ranma was right about something like that?
She frowned as she remembered a whole new set of memories. Ah yes, Mihoshi… Her second try at ‘Chia Minion’ … only to realize there were consequences for having far less material after having made Ranma … from the stomach of a frozen shark, and not taking the time to properly learn to thaw the source material to gain the most of the sample.
As more of the third set of her lifetime flooded in, she turned a little green. The money she had in her account had actually gone DOWN via ret-conning, as she’d been forced to make a number of reparations to people and the Japanese government to pay for damages. She was still rich, VERY wealthy! But…
Damn it! She could’ve bought a dozen endangered pygmy elephant ivory backscratchers with that kind of cash that history stated she’d now spent to cover Mihoshi’s fuck-ups! And ironically, Mihoshi was also a BIG part of why they were in Atlanta Georgia, as “Professor Tendo” saw the pattern and knew that in a decade, Japan was going to bleed her dry through the idiot werecheetah, and her only chance to save her cash flow, was to move…
And was here to ask Gina Diggers for her aide in … house-hunting!
“KAMI-DAMN IT!” she cried, before falling to her knees … shedding actual tears.
“… Is she okay?” asked Mihoshi, before looking to her side … and spotting the downed Ranma-chan. “WAAA~AAAH! MEDIC! BEGIN CPR!”
If Nabiki wasn’t mourning the lost cash, she might have picked up a camera and sold rare furry lesbian real-life pics. She could have more than made up for her loss.
But this was Nabiki Tendo in any reality … and thus, lost out because she was mourning lost profit.
Karma, a bitch in any reality.
Slowly, the door opened; the sensual blonde scientist sticking her head out. She wasn’t afraid! Curiosity only killed the cat--that’s what Britanny was for!
Seeing the Professor weeping while her two ‘chia-cheetahs’ were making out—although the one on the bottom didn’t seem into it at all and was only going with the motions—Gina wondered if it wasn’t too late to try climbing out the window. So what if they were on the third floor? She’d taken dives from higher elevations!
“WAAAA~AAAAH!” cried Mihoshi. “Help me! Ranma-kun … um … Ranma-chan isn’t breathing!”
Gina blinked, recalling the odd gender properties of Nabiki’s oldest male were-cheetah. “… Ye~ees, bring him … er … her, here,” Gina purred.
YES! FATHER’S DAY PRESENT PRE-MADE! And she didn’t even have to go shopping for a card! Sure, he’d mope and moan that he should have known about the male ‘chia-minion’ before Britanny got married, but he had eventually gotten over Raphiel … eventually … maybe … in another few decades…
Of course, she may be selling both of her sisters into sexual slavery to her Father, but sacrifices had to be made … for the species.
Yes … for the species … and nothing else.
Oh wait! He wasn’t breathing! Pushing the door open, the blonde went into action, proving the ‘Doctor’ in her title wasn’t just for show. “Move aside!” she told the rather buxom natural werecheetah as she went to get atop the pigtailed, redheaded one to hopefully save her life and save some bucks on a present for Daddy to earn ulimited brownie points.
Wow … lookit the tits on her! Brit’s gonna bawl with envy, Gina couldn’t help but think as she PROPERLY applied CPR, closing off the neo-female feline’s nose and spreading her own mouth over the lycan’s before breathing firmly in, and then pushing both hands on her chest to get said air out, carefully avoiding teeth and claws.
If she was going to be turned, she’d rather they be male and she be naked.
Within moments, Ranma-chan began coughing, forced back to the world of the living by the glasses wearing blonde. “… Uh … hi?”
“Hello yourself,” Gina greeted pleasantly, relieved that she’d saved her upcoming Father’s Day Present. “I believe you’d like some hot water?” After all, one needed to check the goods before they made a purchase.
“PLEASE!” Ranma-chan shouted, sitting up firmly. She frowned as she realized, “Hey … why’s Nabs crying over there?”
“… No clue,” Gina answered honestly. Probably something to do with a Japanese cultural value or another.
“WAAA~AAAH!” cried Mihoshi, proving Darwin right … even about people from space. “YOU LIVE!” Mihsohi cried, knocking Gina offer her perch and forcing the redhead’s face … between her own massive chest.
Gina barely pulled herself from the floor, before spotting the wildly waving redhead … as Mihoshi tried to smother her in her own chest.
Wow! Brit really is gonna bawl in envy! she thought, spotting that even the fully-female werecheetah’s were even bigger than the gender-shifter’s. “Um … she won’t live much longer if you suffocate her.”
Mihoshi stopped crying, to blink at Gina. “Um … what?” she asked, as Ranma-chan’s waves got weaker.
Raising her head from her hands, Nabiki took a few deep breathes—which sounded suspiciously like heaving sobs—before screaming, “JUST RELEASE HER, YOU DUMB BLONDE!!”
“EEP!” Mihoshi squealed as she threw Ranma-chan back and away from her.
Of course, being a werecheetah in hybrid form, she had considerable strength to do such with.
In this case, enough to send Ranma-chan sailing down the hallway, through a wall, and into the Museum proper where she came crashing down on the Antique Ming Vase Display, destroying a half dozen Third Dynasty pieces.
Moving up to the hole Mihoshi created, the group stared at the carnage that lay down on the first floor of said museum.
Gina turned to look at Nabiki with a disapproving frown. “You know you gotta pay for that, right? Cash, no charge or check.”
Sighing, the middle Tendo daughter reached into her lab pocket and took out her check book and pen. “And there goes endangered pygmy elephant ivory backscratcher number thirteen…
“Besides, you know my checks are good—you cash them often enough for the fundraisers you do.”
A cry of, “I’m okay!” could be heard from down in the rubble.
“Okay,” Nabiki muttered, dragging the still-picking-ancient-pottery-out-of-her-ass Saotome with her, as she stared down Mihoshi. She had been able to find a nice, sound-proof meeting room to get more out of the former D’Jinn.
To her benefit, Mihoshi cracked much sooner than a newb in Nerima.
“I GOT SUSPENDED FOR GRANTING A WISH I SHOULDN’T HAVE AND NOW I’M STUCK IN THIS UNIVERSE WITH YOU FOR A THOUSAND LIFETIMES!”
“Well … FUCK!” Nabiki cried. Didn’t Djinn know of getting off for good behavior?
“… Does this look like a horse or a guy with a bow?” Ranma-chan asked, pulling out a larger piece of pottery from her backside. Damn healing factor never did just push the stuff out, just bled until you did it.
Whimpering, the female werecheetah turned to look at it. “I think it looks more like a guy with a bow ON a horse…”
Ranma blinked her eyes once, twice. “AH! So one of those Mongols then…” she said as he flipped said piece over his shoulder, followed by the sound of porcelain breaking.
Nabiki winced. So that’s what the sound of $2,000 down the toilet sounded like.
Then she just twitched. Did Saotome have no other mission in life than to cost her money?
“… White piece,” Ranma-chan muttered, before tossing more pottery over her shoulder.
… Yes, yes it was. “Can we focus here for a moment,” Nabiki growled, “while we have no one observing us?”
“… Does that mean you’ll not show us your crotchless panties?” Mihoshi asked, wondering where she could buy some.
The middle Tendo daughter flushed. She turned about away from the two spotted idiots for a moment to open her lab-coat. Checking herself over, she felt relieved as, yes, this was one of her “socialization” outfits—meaning everything important that needed to be covered WAS covered.
Closing the lab-coat again, she turned back to the pair of dim-wits. “Listen you two! As long as we’re here, you two are MY responsibility!”
Ranma-chan blinked her eyes once, twice “Wait; so you grew us in a test-tube AND you’re responsible?”
Nodding her head firmly, Nabiki replied, “Yeah. What about it, Saotome?”
“… Does that mean you’re our mommy?”
*SMACK*!
“MOMMY’S VIOLENT!” cried Mihoshi.
*SMACK x2!*
“Hey!” Ranma-chan yelled, holding her head.
“Crossfire, Saotome,” Nabiki waved off. “Deal with it.
“Now, I need to make sure we’re on the same page before this blows up in our face!”
Ranma nodded … and then passed out as she recalled doing such events to Nabiki and Mihoshi, and not in theirs or her face.
Twitching, Nabiki turned to Mihoshi … who was looking at the window and pawing a butterfly.
… Truly, she was on her own.
There was a knock at the door. “Hello?” came the voice of the blonde genius from outside. “Is everything okay in there, Professor Tendo? We still have a meeting to get to and I DO have other appointments today.”
Sighing, the most Mercenary of Soun’s daughter’s called over her shoulder, “A few more minutes, Dr. Diggers! Just making sure both my … er … ‘Minions’ don’t cause any more trouble!”
Silence answered her for a few moments. “… You’re handcuffing them to the radiator in the room, aren’t you?“
… Nabiki considered it for a moment … before shaking her head. No way was she purchasing another Jade-brand pregnancy test! They were expensive, and gold was worth a lot more than the last time! Besides, she might actually hurt herself with the shards on the floor! “… No,” she proclaimed, before tossing the hot water down on Ranma.
As the neo-male-were-cheetah sputtered, she glared at the two. “You are coming with me and no doing … it!” she proclaimed.
Ranma nodded, before turning to Mihoshi. “What is it?”
Mihoshi just shrugged. She had asked her former bosses that, even Ryoko and Ayeka in her old life.
No one answered.
Standing up, Nabiki made her way to the door. She put on her best ‘professional’ face and opened it. “All right, Dr. Diggers. We’re ready … now if we may head to your office to discuss some things?”
Realizing that there was a blank look in her eye and that Gina was simply staring silently over her shoulder, the Tendo woman turned around.
Yep, there was Ranma with his shirt off, wringing it of the excess water.
“Ranma! Shirt on before I smack you again!!”
Yelping in fear, the pigtailed werecheetah fumbled with the garment for a bit before forcing it back on himself … backwards.
Raising a hand, Nabiki smacked herself in the face.
“Hooray!” Mihoshi cheered at the action. “She’s equal opportunity!”
Granted, she was referring to the face-smacking … but that didn’t stop Gina from now staring at Professor Tendo in a bit of shock.
Trying to save what remained of her reputation, Nabiki stared at Gina. “Now … imagine them breeding.”
Gulping, Gina nodded, turned away, and walked forward.
Nabiki smirked. Another problem solved.
Looking down, Ranma winced as his shirt was backwards, and tried to remove it.
*RIIIIP!*
And once again, Gina turned and focused on a Grade-A piece of male meat and Nabiki winced as the Gods answered a challenge.
Nabiki knew why; the Nerima Meat Club had verified it … before the female members abandoned ship and signed on to the Ranma-kun Fan Club.
Ranma was just perfection as far as female hormones were concerned. His father may have fucked up a lot of things in raising the pigtailed jock, but the fat bastard knew how to sculpt a body to athletic perfection—it was just too bad he ignored his own. Ranma was truly Olympic Gold!
… And now as a werecheetah—and for some reason, all werecats were truly enhanced versions of their human base—in his hybrid form, Ranma was a pure Adonis.
Sighing, Nabiki reached over with her left hand to cup Gina’s chin. She then lifted it back up into place. “You know, Dr. Diggers; you keep ogling him like that, I’m going to have to start charging by the minute.”
Wincing, Gina nodded, and prepared to turn away.
*RIIIIP!*
“My pants!” Ranma-kun cried.
Nabiki winced as a near-flaming hundred-dollar-bill was slapped into her hand, as Gina turned around.
Blinking, looking at the money, Gina, and then Ranma’s new money-shot, Nabiki had to smirk. All she needed now was a purple felt suit, goldfish-filled boots, and a cane, and she was ready to return to Nerima.
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(Posted Fri, 17 Aug 2012 03:20)
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