"Everything's relative," said Ino, pressing back against Sakura while presenting her OWN chest towards Sasuke. "See, Sasuke? Aren't these much more to your liking?"
"I never thought that would actually work" said Naruto in a small voice, watching the two girls heft and squeeze their own chests.
"Well, Sasuke, what do you say?" asked Sakura. "Isn't this better than a gu... waitaminute. 'Bandages'?"
"Bandages?' asked Ino. "What bandages?"
Naruto considered telling Hinata any number of things to excuse that he had been staring at girls hefting their chests and pointing them at Sasuke. Hinata was staring herself though so maybe it was okay?
Sasuke, on the other hand, was managing to look supremely BORED by it all.
"They just noticed?" asked Naruto, figuring it was a safe topic of conversation.
"Well," said a flustered Hinata as she considered sitting in Naruto's lap and thereby breaking his line of sight. "They DID sort of have something else in mind."
"Are you two done YET?" asked Sasuke drily.
"Bandages?" asked Ino, sinking back on the bed she'd been kneeling on. "Oh thank goodness. I was so worried."
"I believed in you all along, Sasuke," said Sakura.
"Yeah, right," said Sasuke, Ino, Naruto, and Hinata.
"Uhm," hedged Sakura. "Well, mostly."
Sakura looked around at all the disbelief and blamed that damn dream that had made her late this morning. It was STILL messing with her.
"Just watch this," said Naruto, standing in the middle of the street. "Henge!"BA DUMF!
"Look!" said the version of Sakura with bigger, ahem, shelving. "I'm Sakura Haruno. Teehee."
Sasuke looked over Naruto's transformation. "Sakura's flatter than that. And her forehead's bigger."
"Oh, right!" said copy-Sakura. Ba-DUMF!
"Naaaaaaaaaa," said a speck down the street. "Ruuuuu." The speck resolved itself into a pink-haired kunoichi, one fist drawn back as she raced forward to avenge the insult in front of her beloved Sasuke. "ToooooAAAAAAAAAAA?!" Her legs flailed as suddenly a pit trap opened up beneath her. "AAAAAAAAAAAA!"
WUMPF! clatterclatterclatter CHUNK!
"Wow, Megumi, it worked just as you planned," said Naruto, peering into the pit.
"Of course," said the bespectacled member of the Legion Of Sasuke Fangirls. "Sakura was getting too close to Sasuke-"
"Pfeh," disagreed Sasuke.
"-so I HAD to step in!" continued Megumi, her glasses glinting menacingly. "Behold!"
ratchetratchetratchet
"WHAT IS THIS?!" screeched Sakura as she tried to move inside the metal framework that had clicked into place around her. The framework lifted up out of the pit on a lift to ground level while she struggled. Her head and hands were held in place by metal cuffs, there was a bar pressing into the back of her knees to keep the legs folded, and her ankles were likewise cuffed into position.
"You have mocked the Ninjaneer Path, behold its power!" cackled Megumi. "Oh hoh hoh hoh hoh hoh. Those bonds will hold you helpless and in place while the Legion gets funding for the entire year!"
"What are you talking..." asked the squirming Sakura, her voice going quiet as she saw the sign that Naruto was holding.
Kiss Sakura - 100 yen. "YOU -" Sakura said a few things that polite young refined ladies didn't normally say.
Sasuke stepped into her line of sight then, causing the filthy words to be bitten abruptly off.
Then Ino walked into her field of vision, holding another sign.
Spank Sakura - 200 yen/3 whacks "Y-you couldn't," said Sakura. "You wouldn't."
Ino vanished around the side and Sakura could hear the sign being placed behind her. At this point she realized exactly how her rear end was positioned and how exposed she was. "No. This can't be happening."
"You're an annoyance," said Sasuke to her, before stepping back and considering her with a flat look. "Besides. I'm gay and in love with someone else despite being a vengeance-haunted ninja with no time for such things."
"WHAT?!" yelped Sakura, then glanced to the side.
"Hey, don't look at me," said Naruto, currently juggling little yellow happy-face balls. "So who do I pay?"
"I'll KILL YOU if you so much as TOUCH me!" Sakura promised Naruto, who promptly dropped his balls.
"Girls are just too violent," said Sasuke.
"Ooooo, she IS a pretty-pretty," said some guy with white skin. As she watched, the guy tucked his long hair behind one ear. With his tongue. "I'll give her a kiss."
"As long as you take me in," said Sasuke, pouting and taking a coquettish pose.
"Oh, yes, the difference is that YOU are a keeper," said the guy with a smile that seemed to be way too big for his face.
"No, no," said Sakura as the pale-skinned man with the humongous tongue smiled evilly and got closer and closer.
"Wow," said a cat in a top hat and tuxedo, looking on from the sides as he munched some popcorn. "I didn't expect all this! All I was aiming for was a prophetic dream insert. Eternal Void, sometimes all it takes is a little pebble to start rolling and you uncover all sorts of stuff."
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" screamed Sakura as the middle-aged man puckered up, his tongue slithering in and out of his mouth as he closed that last few inches.
Yes, that nightmare was continuing to haunt her.
"Hinata, why are you covering my eyes?" asked Naruto.
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(Posted Mon, 10 Aug 2009 17:06)
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