He was short. Part of it, he was absolutely sure, was that older people tended to shrink in on themselves with the passage of years. He was certain that he'd been taller and graced with bishonen good looks in his youth. Any evidence to the contrary could be ignored as irrelevant.
"Well, well," said the old man as he appeared. "Looks like it's time for me to be an epic hero."
Somewhere, he felt with absolute certainty, there were a number of people clutching their chests or falling over. They were easy to ignore as well.
A redhaired girl frowned down at him. "Kinda short, ain't ya? Yeah, and so who are yooouuuuAIIIIIEEEE!"
"Ah!" said the short guy, whose name was Happosai. He rubbed his face in the valley between the young girl's breasts. "So young, tender, firm."
"GET IT OFF!" shouted the redhead who was finding it impossible to pry the perverted barnacle off her chest.
"Uhm, how?" asked Shinji, as he'd started forward only to realize that if HE touched Asuka in the attempt at removal - she'd kill him.
"Hey now," said Misato. "You do realize she's only-" Grab latch heft squeeze. "GET IT OFF!"
"Not quite as young," said Happosai as he was now thoroughly clinging to Misato's chest. "Not as perky, but much nicer in heft and weight."
"GET OFF OF ME!" demanded Misato as she tried to pull the creature off of her chest.
"Oh dear," said Rei, who was still quietly freaking out - not that anyone else around her noticed any difference.
Jiraiya looked down at his notes, then closed his notebook. "Have you considered maybe toning it down a bit in front of children?"
"Hmmm? Oh yes, old habit," said Happosai, bouncing off. "Well, my boy, you're in luck! You're looking for someone to teach you the skills you'll need as a ninja, right? I'm just the one for that job!"
"Oh yeah?" asked Misato, now recovered enough to show off some of her combat training on the diminuitive guy.
Jiraiya watched carefully. Misato had clearly had some training in hand-to-hand combat, though by his standards it wasn't nearly enough and she'd clearly not been doing a lot of upkeep on those skills of late. The gnome, on the other hand, was easily moving out of her way.
Then Asuka joined the fray, still quite upset with her own groping. The result wasn't much different as concerned the gnome, as he was quite easily avoiding any attempts to grasp or strike him.
Jiraiya considered Asuka's taijutsu level as genin. Experienced genin, but solidly midrange on that front. It was made rapidly worse as her anger and frustration caused her to become more and more sloppy.
A glance at Naruto revealed that the boy was watching in fascination and had picked up on the gnome's abilities in the hand-to-hand combat skills area.
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(Posted Sat, 31 Dec 2011 19:36)
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