Ranma-ryu: Why not a dragon at a luau? [Episode 72697]

by Kestral

Principal Kuno was standing around, ready to give the coveted prize. The smell of roasting pork (dragonflame being used meant it would cook quickly and evenly - Ranma had had to learn precise control of his flame) was thick on the evening breeze.

Neither that, nor the envious looks from the other clubs, particularly concerned Ranma. There were some weird aspects of the wish he had made.

Another weird thing, Ranma-ryu decided as he jetted flames into the firepit to keep the coals glowing a bright cherry red, was the Kuno siblings.

Girl-curse. He'd ended up with Tatewaki after his girl side, Kodachi after his boy side. Each of them loathed the other half of the package. Neither had ever quite understood the curse, even after explanations.

Here neither of the two had that emotional blindness getting involved. Both Kuno knew that Ranma turned into a dragon with cold water, was restored to human by hot.

Tatewaki Kuno was always going on about foul sorcerors, monsters, and so on. He'd started out trying to smash Ranma for just living under the same roof as Akane and things had never gotten better. The best they'd ever gotten along was a temporary truce.

Kodachi on the other hand had originally fancied Ranma's dragon form as a pet. She'd once tried paralysis poison, and had gotten tail bashed to the point where she'd had to be pried out of the wall. Ranma had felt responsible and had tended her long enough for her to wake up and stagger off.

Since then she had been a dragon-otaku. She had once claimed she would do anything for her Ranma-sama. Sarcastically, Nabiki had heard and suggested psychiatric help. Kodachi apparently had missed the sarcasm.

She'd been on medication and going through therapy the past two months and the results were startling. She was still a little loopy, still into gymnastics, still a dragon-otaku, sometimes her speech came out fairly nonsensical, but mainly a fairly normal girl trying to figure out who she was and now regarded her Black Rose persona as another person who occasionally tried to take over. She was actually kind of nice when she was just Kodachi, you just had to keep an eye out for the Black Rose to make an appearance.

So seeing Kodachi showing up at the luau was both a shock and kind of expected. To see her, Akane, Yuka, and Sayuri, giggling together and talking like they were normal people?! Very strange.

Ranma walked around the firepit and jetted out another quick burst. He could do this for a fair amount of time, as long as he paced himself. He could run out of fire and then he'd just want to take a nap otherwise. Little jets or bursts of flame weren't a problem though.

Which brought him to a poster taped up on a display with Nabiki's:

10 More Rules To Keep In Mind Around Dragons.
  1. Do not startle a dragon, for you live in a flammable environment.
  2. Do not annoy dragons, for you are crunchy and good with catsup.
  3. Do not try to forcefeed a fire breathing dragon a lot of water in an effort to put out its pilot light. Dragons do not have pilot lights. See also rule #2 and #4.
  4. Do not make a dragon throw up, for it is more disgusting than you'd care to experience.
  5. Do not try to intimidate a dragon, it rarely works and see also Rule #2.
  6. Do not tell a dragon to piss off. He might take you up on it and that stuff will eat through leather.
  7. Do not sic small animals like lions or tigers or bears on a dragon. At least if you're at all fond of the small animal in question.
  8. Do not tell a dragon you're going to take him to a vet and have him spayed or neutered. See Rules #1 and #2.
  9. Where does a dragon sleep? Wherever he wants to.
  10. What does a dragon eat? What don't they eat is the better question.
Ranma was just beginning to relax when he discovered one of the downsides of being a dragon instead of a cute little girl. In this case it was the arrival of:

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(Posted Sat, 11 Oct 2003 13:32)


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